Break Me
by Revolution Dauntless Hazel Jay
Summary: President Snow hates me. The Capitol hates me. All of Panem hates me. And it's all my fault. President Snow wanted revenge, and he got it. But he isn't done yet.
1. Chapter I

He killed Lance, who was only eight. He killed Becky, who was only five. He killed Manda, who was only ten. And lastly, he killed Elissa by sending her to the games, and she was eighteen. My dad supposedly died in a mine crash along with Katniss's, but I believe that Snow did that on purpose as revenge. My mom disappeared one day and hasn't come back since, but I believe that President Snow has killed her as well.

Why President Snow came at my family is all because of me. You see, the peacekeepers has dragged a man out into the town square and started whipping him. I was one of the people in the crowd, and people said that he had been hunting illegally. The peacekeeper whipped him without mercy, and soon it was too bloody to watch anymore. So I dashed up to the poor bloodied man and the peacekeeper just stared at me. Then he motioned the other peacekeepers over and they untied the man... and tied me to the stake. They tore off my shirt and whipped me at least ten times, but I lost count after that. The peacekeeper finally finished whipping me, untied me, and threw me into the crowd.

"Next time, mind your own business," the peacekeeper said as he walked away. The crowd started to part, leaving me alone to bleed on the pavement. I started to crawl around, not sure where I was going but hoping somebody, anybody, would help me. But everybody walked away from me, probably not wanting to get in trouble themselves. I finally was so weak that I collapsed onto the ground in my own blood. I closed my eyes, awaiting death, when I suddenly felt arms wrap around me and lift me up. I opened my eyes slowly and stared into the eyes of Gale Hawthorne.

"It'll be okay," he whispered down at me right before I blacked out.


	2. Chapter II

My eyes opened slowly. A young girl looked down at me and smiled slightly.

"How are you doing?" she asked.

"Where am I?" I asked.

"My house," the little girl said. "But don't worry; you're safe. My mom healed you. She great at healing people."

I looked over and stared into the eyes of a woman.

"Did you?" I asked her.

"Yes, but really Gale did. If he hadn't gotten you when he did you would probably be dead by now," the woman said.

"Thank you. Where is Gale?" I asked.

"He had to get home to his family," the woman said. "You can probably see him in the morning."

"Who's this?" a voice from the doorway said.

I turned around and looked at a girl who didn't look much older than me. She had a long dark brown braid and a jacket on.

"She's the one that got whipped in the square," the woman said. "What are you doing home so early, Katniss?"

"No reason; just wanted to come home early," the girl, Katniss, said. Katniss walked over to the young girl who had first spoken to me and patter her head.

"How are you doing, Little Duck?" Katniss asked the little girl.

"Katniss!" the little girl giggled, hugging Katniss.

"I guess we should introduce ourselves," the woman said. "I'm Miss Everdeen, Katniss is the one with the braid, and Prim is the young one."

"Nice to meet you all. I'm Melany," I said, sitting up. I let out a moan, not realizing how much sitting up would hurt.

"Take it easy," Miss Everdeen said. "That's gonna hurt for a few days."

"Yeah," I said, slowly turning myself around to face Miss Everdeen. "I have to go now, sadly. My family is waiting for me."

"You sure you don't need any help getting there?" Miss Everdeen asked.

"No," I said, slowly sliding off the table that I had been laying on. I landed on the floor and my back screamed. I gritted my teeth together and tried to show a convincing smile to Miss Everdeen. "I'll be fine."

Miss Everdeen looked at me for a while, then nodded.

"Alright, if you're sure," she said.

"I am. Thank you again for helping me," I said.

I walked over to the door and swung it open. Every move I made hurt. I walked outside and closed the door behind me and started walking toward my house. I suddenly heard footsteps behind me and I whirled around, fists raised.

"Relax," Katniss said. "Just me."

"I said I was fine," I told her, lowering my fists.

"You sure didn't look like it," Katniss said. "And by the looks of it, you're about to fall down face first."

I was silent. It was true; my legs hurt so bad that I was sure I was going to fall at any moment. Katniss held out her hand.

"Come on," she said. "I'll help you get to your house."

I took her hand and said nothing else. Katniss helped me walk down the street and we soon reached my house.

"This is where you live?" Katniss asked.

"Yup," I said, nodding my head at the old battered house. "Nothing special, but it keeps us warm."

Katniss nodded understandingly and helped me to the door. I opened it up and Katniss helped me into my house and I was immediately swarmed with exclamations.

"Where have you been?!" my mother exclaimed.

"We've been worried sick about you!" Elissa exclaimed.

"I missed you, Melany!" Manda exclaimed.

Becky and Lance were crying, Mom, Elissa, and Manda were worried, and I was embarrassed that Katniss was viewing all of it. I turned to her with an apologetic look on my face.

"Sorry," I said. "They're usually like this when I come home late. They're just... worried."

"It's okay," Katniss said. "Can I help with anything else?"

"No, I think I'll be okay from here," I said. "Thanks."

"Anytime," Katniss said, smiling. "Hey, if you ever need anything, just ask."

"Thanks," I said, smiling back at her.

Katniss turned and left and it was then that I realized my family was still shouting at me.

"Calm down!" I exclaimed. They did. And so I told them about what happened. My mom ordered me to show her my back, and she nearly fainted from the sight (which made me feel _so_ much better). Elissa hugged me lightly, not wanting to hurt my back. Becky and Lance were still confused on what happened, and Manda hadn't been paying attention.

"I'm fine, guys," I assured them. Of course, I wasn't really fine. My back had hurt like heck, there was dried blood all over me, and the reaping was only a few days away. Everything was _not_ fine.


	3. Chapter III

I opened my eyes slowly. As soon as I did, I wish I could close them back up. The Reaping was only a day away. I wasn't worried for myself, but for Elissa. Her name was in the reaping bowl eighteen times. Luckily, my family had always had enough food because we worked at the bakery, so Elissa had never had to put in any tessarae. She was eighteen years old, though, and her name was in there eighteen times. If she survived this reaping, however, she wouldn't ever have to go in the games. My name was in there three times now, since I was fourteen. I looked older than I actually was, so people regularly thought I was seventeen instead.

I crawled out of my bed, my back aching. It had been four days since I'd been whipped, and though my back was feeling much better it still hurt.

I looked around for the rest of my family, but they were gone. It was usual that they were gone, however, since they usually got up before me to head to the bakery.

I'd tried working at the bakery before, but I ended up dropping a sack of flour (which got everywhere), burned three pieces of bread, and then I tried some of the bread and ended up being allergic to it. It took two weeks for my face to stop swelling.

So I just wasn't cut out for being a baker. But that was alright. I slipped into my clothes and headed over to Gale's house. I had to thank him; he'd saved my life.

People stared at me as I walked through the streets. Of course they did; they'd all seen me get whipped... and none of them had helped me. Not one of them.

I held my head high and walked proudly through the streets, though my back ached with every move. I reached Gale's house and knocked on the door lightly. It swung open and Rory stood at the doorway.

"Hi," he said. "What do you need?"

"I uh... was looking for Gale," I replied.

"He's... um... not here," Rory said. "What'd you need?"

"I just wanted to thank him," I said. "For... uh..."

Rory raised his eyebrow, waiting for me to continue.

"You know, I can just come back later," I said, not waiting for an answer and walking away. I could hear his front door close behind me and I didn't look back. I wanted to thank Gale, not someone to thank him for me. It wouldn't be the same. I sighed and started walking blindly around. I didn't know where I was going, and I quite frankly didn't care. I ended up by the fence. I looked around and saw a tree sitting by the fence. I climbed the tree, grabbed an apple, and then slid back down. I bit into the apple and the juicy flavor filled my mouth. My back hurt even more from the climb, but the apple was worth it. I sat down and leaned against the trunk as I ate the apple. I saw movement from the corner of my eye and turned around to look at none other than Gale Hawthorne... on the other side of the fence. Behind him was Katniss. They slid under the fence and started walking toward the Hob. They've been in the forest! I thought. They've gone under the fence!

"Hey!" I called without thinking. I got to my feet and quickly ran toward them Katniss and Gale whirled around to face me. "Hey!" I shouted again. "What were you just doing?!" I saw something dead in Katniss's hand and realized it was a squirrel.

"What do you mean?" Katniss said, hiding the squirrel behind her back.

"You just came from the forest!" I exclaimed. "How did you? I thought the fence was electrocuted!"

Katniss and Gale looked at each other, than at me.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?" Katniss asked me.

I blinked.

"You didn't answer my question," I said.

"Ah!" Katniss exclaimed. "You're the girl that got-"

She abruptly stopped speaking. I knew what she was going to say, and so did she, but she'd stopped.

"-Whipped," I finished for her. "It's okay. I don't mind that I got whipped; the peacekeepers are just cruel. Now, please answer my question."

"We can tell her, Catnip," Gale said muttered. "We can trust her."

"How do you know?" Katniss whispered.

"She stood up for that man," Gale said.

Katniss paused for a moment.

"Alright," Katniss said.

"You know," Gale said, walking up to me. "I never did get your name."

"I never had the chance to give it to you," I said. "My name is Melany."

"Melany," Gale said. "That's a nice name. Now, I'm going to tell you something that you can't tell anybody else, okay?"

"You don't have to talk to me like I'm five years old," I said.

Gale blinked then nodded.

"Alright," he said. "Me and Catnip hunt in the woods to feed our families."

"What?!" I exclaimed, backing away.

"Shh!" Gale said. "Katniss's family almost starved to death! They couldn't just sit there and wait to die!"

I turned away and tried to gather my thoughts.

"We had to survive," Katniss whispered.

I turned my head up and looked at her.

"Alright," I said. "I won't tell anybody, though I don't think what you're doing is right."

"Thank you," Katniss said. "We really must be going, though. My mom's waiting for me..."

"Alright," I said.

They started to walk away.

"Gale!" I shouted as he walked away. He turned to look at me. "Thank you! For saving me!"

"You saved yourself," Gale said, grinning back at me.


	4. Chapter IV

The whole day all I could think about was the reaping that would be coming the next day. I was more nervous for Elissa than Elissa was nervous for herself.

I headed down the street and to the Hob. I thought I'd buy some candy for Becky. I headed over to the candy counter and searched through the candy. I felt something move at my side and I looked over but saw nothing. I shrugged and started searching through the candy again. I saw some mints and started to pick them up when a hand suddenly shoved down on my arm. I looked up and straight into the eyes of a peacekeeper. But not just any peacekeeper; the one who had whipped me.

"Excuse me," he said. "You better pay for those."

"Uh, I am," I said. "I just picked them up."

"Oh really?" the peacekeeper said. "Well, I don't seem to see any money anywhere on you."

"It's in my pocket," I said, glaring at him. I shoved my hand into my pocket and searched for the money that I had put in there only. Except I didn't feel anything. I took my hand out of my pocket and searched the other pocket. Both were empty. I then frantically searched through my bag, but knew it wouldn't be there. I remembered putting it in my pocket. I looked up at the peacekeeper with a confused look on my face.

"I swear, I had money..." I said.

"Doesn't look like that to me," the peacekeeper said.

"Well, even though I know I had money, I didn't even steal it. I just picked it up," I said.

The peacekeeper let go of my hand.

"I'll keep an eye on you," he said, backing away.

"Go on; you won't find anything wrong," I said.

I turned back to put the candy away.

"Wait a minute," he said, trotting back over to me. "What's that sticking out of your bag?"

I looked over at my bag and saw something sticking out of it. The peacekeeper opened up my bag and took out the thing that had been sticking out of it; a bag of candy.

"I take it you paid for these too?" the peacekeeper said.

"What the heck?!" I exclaimed. "I didn't put those there! This is the first time I've been here all day!"

"Doesn't look like that to me," the peacekeeper said, grabbing my hand. "You know the penalty for stealing is death, right?"

"I didn't steal anything!" I exclaimed, yanking my arm from his grip. I started to run away, my heart pumping.

"Come back here!" the peacekeeper shouted behind me. I heard footsteps behind me and I ran even faster. Peacekeepers suddenly dashed around the corner and in front of me and I skidded to a halt. They grabbed me and hauled me away. A single tear slid down my cheek. I didn't want to die. Not this way.


	5. Chapter V

The peacekeepers dragged me to the town square. A crowd soon formed. Most of them shook their heads, probably recognizing me from the whipping. The peacekeepers forced me to my knees and the one who had whipped me stood above me and reached for his gun. He pulled it out and cocked it. He put it between my eyes and put his finger on the trigger. I shut my eyes and awaited the shot.

"Stop!" a voice rang out from the crowd.

My eyes fluttered open and I saw Katniss running toward me.

"Stop it! Stop!" she exclaimed, breathing heavily.

"What is this interruption?!" the peacekeeper exclaimed, not removing the gun from my head.

"She didn't do it," Katniss said. "I saw the whole thing. Somebody stole her money and dropped the candy in her bag so that it would look like she stole it."

That would explain the movement I felt by my side right before the peacekeeper had come over...

"All the evidence shows that she stole it," the peacekeeper said, still not removing the gun.

"Fine, if you're going to be that way," Katniss said, shoving me aside and sitting down in my place. "Shoot."

Gale suddenly emerged from the crowd and sat beside Katniss. He moved the gun to his head.

"Both of us," he said.

The peacekeeper fumed.

"Get out of here, both of you!" he shouted, pointing the gun at me. "She deserves the punishment!"

"We'll take her punishment!" Gale shouted.

"So will I," a voice from the crowd said. I turned and looked at the boy who I had seen at the other bakery. Peeta, I think his name was. He sat down beside Katniss and moved the peacekeepers gone back to their heads. The peacekeeper was even more mad.

"Get out of here!" he shouted.

"It's all of us or none of us," Katniss said.

The peacekeeper was silent for a few moments. All I could do was sit there and watch. I was sure he would pull the trigger when he slowly pulled the gun away and put it in his holster.

"Go away," he muttered. "But let this be your warning. Don't ever come across me or any other peacekeeper again."

And then he walked away. Everybody was silent; even the birds. Katniss slowly got to her feet, followed by Gale and Peeta. She walked over to me and reached down a hand. I took it and she helped me to my feet.

"Woah, that looks like it hurts," Katniss said.

"What?" I said, looking down. My pants had a hole where my knee was and my knee was bleeding. "I must've skinned it when they shoved me to the ground."

"I'll get my mom to help you with that," Katniss said. "Come on."

"Thank you," I said, feeling close to tears. I usually wasn't a crier, but the weight of what had just happened had finally hit me. They would have all died for me. All of them.

"You didn't deserve to die," Peeta said, patting my shoulder.

"The peacekeepers can be ruthless," Gale said.

"I see that," I said. "Thank you. All of you. It... it means so much. But, if you don't mind me asking, why did you do it?"

"You were innocent," Katniss said, shrugging. "Nobody deserves to die if they're innocent. Now come on, you gotta get cleaned up."

"I have to go; my mom's waiting for me at the baker," Peeta said. "I'm glad you're okay."

"Thanks you so much, Peeta," I said.

He smiled and nodded, then headed toward the bakery.

"I have to get home. Posy's waiting for me," Gale said.

"Thank you, Gale," I said.

"Anytime," he said, smiling and walking toward his home.

Katniss led me through the crowd of people who stared at us as we swerved through them. They were whispering and I heard my name more than once.

"Ignore them," Katniss whispered to me.

She led me out of the crowd and to her house. She opened the front door and led me inside.

"Mom!" she called. "A little help!"

Miss Everdeen poked her head around the corner and her mouth dropped open, her eyes wandering to my leg.

"Oh my!" she exclaimed. "Get her over here!"

Katniss led me over to a chair and I sat down in it while Miss Everdeen started to work on my leg. She cleaned it first with some sort of liquid that stung and then pulled out a needle and thread and started to sew it up. I bit my lip and tried not to look. A tear started to slide down my cheek but I quickly wiped it away. I wasn't crying because of the pain, but because Katniss, Gale, and Peeta had actually cared enough to risk their lives for me. Nobody had ever done that for me.

"Hey, you okay?" Katniss asked, obviously noticing the tear.

"I'm fine," I said, taking in a big breath. "I just can't believe you helped me."

"Don't mention it," Katniss said, grinning.

Miss Everdeen cut the thread and looked up at me.

"Alright, you're good to go," she said, smiling.

My father and Katniss's father had died in the same mine crash, I realized now, looking at Katniss. I'd seen her by the mines along with my family, waiting for the man that would never come out. Waiting for the father that would never come home again. And I admired this family so much; the way they'd wake up everyday despite the fact that their father/husband was gone. The way they still smiled even though they'd gone through so much pain. I'd rarely smiled after my father's death, and when I did it was only slightly. I couldn't smile, though, because whenever I tried to it always turned into a frown. But seeing this family full of hope and bravery let out a smile despite their losses gave me hope myself. Maybe I could smile again, and if I really, really tried, maybe I could even laugh.


	6. Chapter VI

The peacekeeper who had accused me of stealing forced me to the ground and put a gun to my head.

"You deserve this, you filthy wretch," he said, and pulled the trigger. I felt the bullet go through my head and felt myself collapse to the ground. I felt my little sister shaking my dead body and asking me to wake up with tears running down her face.

I screamed and sat up in my bed, sweat running down my forehead.

"Melany?" my mom whispered. "You okay?"

I breathed in and out, trying to slow my breathing.

"Yeah," I said. "What happened?"

"I heard you screaming," my mom said. "Nightmare?"

"Yeah," I said. "It was just a nightmare."

"Honey, I know that nightmare probably took a lot out of you, but it's time to get dressed for the reaping," my mom said.

"Oh," I commented, realizing that it was reaping day. "Right."

"You sure you're going to be alright?" my mom asked.

"Yeah," I said. "I'll be fine. Thanks for waking me up."

"Sure," my mom said, walking out of the house an outside. I rubbed my eyes and washed my face and hair. Then I slipped on my dark brown dress and pulled my wet hair back behind my ears. I said goodbye to Becky, Lance, Manda, and my mom and headed out the door with Elissa. I looked up at her and she looked down at me, smiling slightly. I didn't smile back.

"Hey, it'll be okay," she said, hugging me from the side as we walked toward the square. The peacekeepers took our blood and then I waved at Elissa and headed toward my age group; 14. Effie Trinket headed onto the stage as soon as everybody was in the square.

"Welcome, welcome!" Effie said in her cheery voice. "Here's a video all the way from the Capitol!"

The familiar Capitol propaganda played and I rocked back and forth on my feet, nervous. After it ended, Effie Trinket smiled and looked at the crowd.

"And now the time has come to select one courageous young man and woman for the honor of representing District 12 in the 72nd Hunger Games," Effie Trinket said. That was a mouthful, I thought. Effie Trinket headed over to the girl's reaping bowl, moved her hand around in it, and pulled out a slip of paper. She headed over to the microphone and read the name out, loud and clear.

"Ellisa Ellint," she read into the microphone. My eyes widened and I felt close to tears. My worst fear had come true: Ellisa was going to the games. Ellisa slowly started to walk toward the stage.

"Are there any volunteers?" Effie Trinket asked. I could volunteer. I started to push through the crowd shakily and started to say the familiar words when Effie Trinket walked over to the boy's reaping bowl. I was too late. I couldn't volunteer anymore. Ellisa was going to the games, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.


	7. Chapter VII

I dashed into the Justice Building and through the double doors and to Elissa. She pulled me into a long hug.

"I'm so, so sorry," I whispered, tears running down my cheeks. "I was going to volunteer but I was too late."

"It's okay," Elissa said. "I saw you pushing through the crowd. I'm glad you didn't volunteer, though."

"What?" I pulled away from her and looked her in the eyes.

"I'm glad you don't have to go to the games," Elissa said. "Besides, I'm most likely going to be the oldest one in the arena, so maybe I'll win and come home."

"Please come home," I said. "I've already lost dad. I can't loose you, too."

"Don't worry," Elissa said, pulling me into another hug. "I'll be home before you know it."

I swallowed and wiped a tear from my cheek. I had to be strong. For Elissa.

"Time to go," a peacekeeper said, grabbing my arm and dragging me toward the door.

"Come home, Elissa!" I shouted to her as the peacekeepers dragged me away. "Come home!"

The peacekeepers shut the doors and motioned the other people in our family in, along with a few of Elissa's friends. Why they let me go in first, I don't know. All I wanted was for Elissa to survive the games.

The tribute parade started. All of the districts' tribute came on screen. And then the District 12 chariot came. Elissa and the boy tribute from our district were completely naked and covered in coal dust, the usual attire for District 12 tributes during the parade. Elissa didn't look happy at all, but at least she wasn't giving them any satisfaction.

Elissa got a training score of five. The closer it got to the games, the more doubtful I became of Elissa ever coming back home.

"So, tell me, Elissa," Caesar Flickerman said. "I take it you have family back home?"

"Yes," Elissa said, looking gorgeous in her black dress with jewels all over it. Her hair was curled and she had red lipstick on. "There's Becky, Lance, Manda, Melany, and my mom."

"Wow, quite a family you have there," Caesar said, not at all looking like he was wondering where are dad was.

"Yeah; it's pretty big," Elissa said, smiling.

"It is indeed," Caesar said, smiling back. "Now, tell me, are you going to change District 12's history of losing and win these games?"

"I will try," Elissa said, looking straight at the TV screen. It felt like she was looking straight at me, as if she was reassuring me that she would be coming home. "I will definitely try, Caesar."

The buzzer sounded, signalling that her interview was over. She would try to come home, and that's all I could ask her to do.

Elissa and all the other tributes stood on their pedestals, waiting for the countdown to reach zero. I looked at Elissa, who looked nervous but determined. The arena was a barren desert; nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, nowhere to get water. If anybody wanted to survive, they would have to go to the Cornucopia and get water supplies from there. It was a great idea on the gamemakers part; it forced all the tributes into the cornucopia to fight each other.

The countdown was coming to an end... 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. The tributes jumped off their pedestals, nearly all of them running toward the cornucopia... Elissa being one of them. She dashed to the cornucopia, grabbed a backpack and large jug of water, and took off blindly. There really was nowhere to go. She kept on running, though, and everybody was too busy at the bloodbath to chase her down.

Elissa had survived a week in the arena. There were only two tributes left; her, and the girl from 2. She was so close to winning. She would win. I stared at the screen as large hot rocks fell from the sky. Elissa dodged them quickly and ran straight forward. The gamemakers were pushing them together, of course. For the final battle that would decide the victor.

Elissa arrived at the cornucopia just as the District 2 girl did. They charged at each other. Elissa drew a knife that had been in her backpack and threw it at the District 2 girl. The D2 girl dodged it quickly and drew her knife. She and Elissa clashed and they fell to the ground, clawing and punching each other. Te D2 girl eventually pinned Elissa to the ground and drew her knife.

"Just you and me now, 12," she said. "Nobody to save you, nobody to help you."

_No,_ I thought. _Please don't._

"The final battle," the D2 girl started to say. "Has to be memorable, doesn't it?" She moved the knife just above Elissa's face. "Well, I'll make it memorable."

"No!" I shouted at the TV screen, tears already starting to run down my cheeks.

I wanted to look away from the TV so bad, but my eyes stayed glued to it. I wanted to block out Elissa's screams so bad, but I couldn't. By the time that Elissa had finally stopped screaming and her cannon sounded, she was torn to bits. My cheeks had tear stains and I was still crying. She had died in the worst way possible, and she was never coming home. My mom held me in her arms, weeping too. My sister was dead. She was never, ever coming back home. She was never, ever going to sing our special song again. She was never, ever going to say "it'll be okay" ever again.


	8. Chapter VIII

I cried for days. The only time I ever got out of bed was to eat, and then I'd crawl back in and start crying again.

My family left me alone for a week. I was glad they did; I didn't want anybody to talk to me or look at me. But after a week, my mom was getting worried.

"Melany," she said, sitting on the edge of my bed. "Sweetheart, you have to get up. If not for yourself, then for the kids. They miss you."

Becky. Manda. Lance. I was the only big sister they had left.

"I have to take care of them," I croaked. I hadn't spoken for a week, and the only sound my vocal cords ever made was crying. I wiped the tears from my eyes and slowly started to slowly raise up out of my bed. My body shook but I was soon on my feet.

"Thanks, Mom," I said.

"You sure you're going to my okay?" she asked me.

"I'll be fine," I said.

"If you're sure," my mom said. "I'll be at the bakery if you need me."

"Okay," I said. My mom left and I poured water into a bowl and washed myself for the first time in a week. The tears on my cheek disappeared as the water washed over my face. After showering, I slipped on a shirt, pants, and boots and headed outside. A cold blast of wind hit my face and blew my hair back. I breathed in the fresh air and headed toward the Hob. People looked at me sympathetically as I walked by. I was no longer the girl who got whipped; I was the girl who lost a sister.

Just as I was about toe enter the Hob a peacekeeper stepped in front of me.

"Excuse me," I said as I started to go around him. He blocked my way again.

"You have to come with me," he said.

"Why?" I asked.

He grabbed my arm and started to drag me away, not replying to my question.

"Why?!" I asked again, growing more frantic. He didn't answer again. I started to tug on my arm, but he quickly tightened his grip. He stopped walking and looked me in the eye.

"I can do this the hard way or the easy way," the peacekeeper said with an intimidating look on his face. I gulped and he started to walk away with me. He walked through the town square and people stared at me again, their looks now confused instead of sympathetic. The peacekeeper dragged me into the Justice Building and down multiple hallways. He swung open a door and shoved me inside the room, then closed and locked the door behind me. I swung around and quickly tried to turn the handle of the door, but it wouldn't budge.

"Let me out!" I shouted, pounding on the door.

"Miss Ellint," a voice behind me said.

I whirled around and stared into cold, unmerciful eyes. The smell of blood filled the room.

"Who are you?" I asked with a shaky voice.

"My name is Snow," the man said. "I am the President of Panem, and you, Miss Ellint, have caused a problem for me."


	9. Chapter IX

_President Snow,_ I thought, recognizing him now from TV. _What does he possibly want from me?_

"What kind of problem?" I asked, trying to stay calm.

"A big problem," Snow said. "I'm sure you remember stealing that candy."

"I didn't steal it," I said firmly.

"Perhaps you didn't," Snow said. "But either way, you were supposed to get punishment."

"In other words, I was supposed to die," I said.

"Yes," Snow said. "But you didn't get that punishment, did you? You were stood up for."

"Yeah. And?" I said.

"Hope," Snow said.

"Pardon?" I said, not understanding at all.

"You were given hope," Snow said. "The people of District 12 were given hope. Hope is a very dangerous thing."

"How so?" I asked.

"Hope can destroy," Snow said. "It can ruin the Capitol."

"Right," I said. "Skip to the part where you explain why you and I are here."

"Be careful who you order around, Miss Ellint," Snow said. "I am the most powerful person you will ever meet, and I could kill everybody you love with a snap of my fingers."

I gulped, suddenly realizing that it was the President I was talking to. He was the most powerful person in Panem, and he could surely kill my family. After all, he did already kill Elissa.

"Now," Snow continued. "The reason I am here is so I can warn you. The reason you are here is to know that you have caused a problem for me, Miss Ellint. You have caused hope. And people will cling to that hope with everything they have and it can destroy Panem."

"What are you asking me to do?" I asked.

Snow leaned forward on the chair he was sitting on.

"What I'm asking you to do, Miss Ellint, is to stay out of trouble," he said. "Make people believe that you won't cause any problem. And you won't cause any problem if you want your family to live."

"I won't do anything bad," I said, swallowing.

"You better not," Snow said. "Your family's lives depend on it."


	10. Chapter X

The peacekeepers unlocked the door and led me out of the Justice Building. I walked down the stairs by myself and headed toward home. About halfway to my home, I stopped dead in my tracks. I don't want to go home, I thought. At least not yet. So I turned around and headed toward Katniss's house. I replayed her words to me after she'd help me walk home after my whipping.

"If you ever need anything, just ask."

I needed something desperately, as much as I hated to admit it. I didn't like it when i had to ask people for things, but I needed help.

I walked up to Katniss's door and knocked lightly. After a few moments, it opened up slightly and Prim peaked her head out.

"Oh, hi!" she said, opening the door wider to allow me in.

"Who's at the door?" Katniss called, walking around a corner to see me.

"Hi," I said.

"Oh, it's you!" Katniss said, grinning and walking over to me. "What do you need?"

"I... um... I need your help," I said.

"With what?" Katniss asked.

"It's something, uh, outside," I said, not wanting Prim or anybody else to hear what I had to say.

"Okay," Katniss said, then turned to Prim. "I'll see you later, Little Duck!"

"Quack!" Prim said, giggling.

Katniss and I headed outside. I started to sit down on a bench, but Katniss shook her head.

"The forest is better for talking," she whispered.

"That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about," I said as we headed toward the forest. "I need help."

"With what?" Katniss asked as we neared the fence that wasn't electrocuted.

"My parents can't work at the bakery anymore and we don't ahve any food," I blurted out. Katniss stopped dead in her tracks.

"What?" she said.

"The peacekeepers said that there only had to be one bakery, so they kicked my family out of the bakery," I explained further. "We barely have enough money now to buy food."

Katniss paused for a moment.

"So you want to learn how to hunt?" she asked.

I nodded.

"Alright," she said. "But you have to be very quiet. And you can't tell anybody. I mean, maybe your family, but be careful. Do you know how to use a bow or anything like that?"

"Not really," I said.

"Don't worry, I'll teach you," Katniss said, smiling. "Now come on; we gotta get to the forest. Gale's waiting for me."

She showed me how to get under the fence and then showed me to the woods.

"I hide my bow and arrows in a trunk so that nobody will find them if they ever do come out here," Katniss said, pulling out her bow and arrows.

"Catnip!" a voice said from the distance. I turned around and saw Gale walking toward us. "Who's this?"

"You remember Melany, don't you?" Katniss asked.

"Of course," Gale said, smiling at me. "How could I not? What I meant was, what's she doing here?"

"I'm teaching her how to hunt," Katniss said, handing me her bow and arrows. I slipped the quiver onto my back and pulled out an arrow.

"It's going to take a lot of practice," Gale said. "And a lot of time."

"She'll get it," Katniss said, shooting Gale a look. Gale laughed and sat down on a log. Katniss walked over to a tree and etched three circles on it, the smallest being in the center.

"Try your best to hit the center," she said, stepping away from the tree.

I knocked the arrow I'd pulled out and pulled the bowstring to my cheek. I looked at the center of the target and then at the tip of my arrow. I kept my elbow up and aimed slightly downward. I kept both eyes open. And then I let go of the bowstring. My arrow made a whooshing sound as it flew off my bow and soared straight ahead. Katniss's eyes widened as the arrow dug itself into the center of the smallest circle, a bull's-eye.

"Well," Gale said. "Guess it won't take that much time after all."

"How'd you do that?" Katniss asked.

"I have no idea," I said.

"Try it again," Katniss said.

I took out another arrow and shot it. It went through the arrow I had shot before and I got another bull's-eye.

"Well it wasn't luck," Gale said, looking at Katniss.

"You sure you haven't ever done archery before?" Katniss asked me.

"Never," I said, still staring at the two bull's-eyes I'd gotten.

"You must be a natural," Gale said.

Katniss stared at me for a moment, and then put out her hand. I handed her the bow and quiver full of arrows.

"Guess practice is over," she said, smiling at me. "Now what you need is your own bow."

"Where do I get one?" I asked.

"Oh, you don't get one," Katniss said. "You make it. I can show you how, if you like."

"I'd love that," I said.

_President Snow might be after my family, _I thought. _But I won't dare let him starve them to death._


	11. Chapter XI

I headed to the hob and traded in a few squirrels with Katniss for some food. Katniss said goodbye and headed to her home. I was about to as well when I suddenly heard a noise from behind me. I turned around and saw a peacekeeper grabbing a girl's hand.

"You stole it!" the peacekeeper shouted. He had a bread roll in his hand.

"I didn't! I swear!" the girl screamed. Without thinking, I trudged over to the peacekeeper and shoved his hand away from the girl.

"If she said she didn't steal it, she didn't steal it!" I shouted at him. This reminded me so much of my encounter with the peacekeeper.

"Get out of here!" the peacekeeper shouted at me, then turned back to the girl and grabbed her arm. "You're going to die for this!"

"No!" the girl screamed, tugging on her arm.

"I STOLE IT!" I shouted.

Everybody went quiet, even the screaming girl.

"You... stole it?" the peacekeeper said slowly.

"Yeah, I just saw it sitting there and decided to take it," I said. The peacekeeper looked at me unbelieving. "Leave her alone. I stole it."

The peacekeeper stared at me for so long that I thought he wouldn't believe me.

"Fine," he said, letting go of the girl. "You stole it." He nodded his head at the other peacekeepers and they grabbed my arms and started to carry me away to the town square. I looked down at the ground and saw now that the blood from the gash on my knee stained it. They threw me down to the ground and the peacekeeper drew his gun. He put it inbetween my eyes just like the time before and cocked it.

"Just do it," I whispered.

He suddenly lowered his gun slightly and pulled the trigger. Pain shot through my shoulder and I collapsed to the ground. Blood poured out of my shoulder. I put my hand to my shoulder and pressed down hard on it to try and stop the bleeding. I looked up at the peacekeeper who leaned down right above my ear.

"President Snow made me promise to keep you alive," he whispered, his voice cold and unmoving. "Until everything calmed down. You better think twice before you go taking the blame for someone else."

And with that, he walked away, gun in hand. I tried to stand up, but I just fell back down on the cobble. I started to crawl forward, knowing that if I got to Katniss's house that I'd be alright. I'm an idiot, I thought to myself. President Snow said to not give them hope. I just stood up for a girl who didn't steal anything and said I stole it! That's sure to give them hope!

It was getting harder and harder to crawl, and nobody in the crowd dared help me. I soon just collapsed on the ground and waited for death to come. Surely death would be better than having to watch Snow kill my family. I closed my eyes and let the darkness consume me. But very, very far away I felt arms wrap around me. Very, very far away I heard the familiar words "it'll be okay".

I opened my eyes slowly and moaned. My shoulder hurt like heck. And then I realized it: I wasn't dead.

"It'll be okay," Elissa's voice said.

Maybe I was dead. After all, if I was hearing Elissa than I had to be dead.

"How are you feeling?" Elissa asked.

"Pretty bad, considering that this is Heaven," I said, moaning and rolling over. But instead of seeing Elissa, I saw Katniss.

"Heaven?" Katniss said, smiling slightly. "You're far from it, Mel."

"I thought you were Elissa," I said, feeling sad. I wanted it to be Elissa. I wanted to be dead.

"Elissa?" Katniss asked. "That girl in the games?"

"She is- was my sister," I said.

"Your sister?" Katniss said, her voice full of shock. "I didn't know she was your sister..."

"Yeah," I said.

"I didn't now," Katniss said, sounding apologetic. "That's why you were gone for a week. I don't know how you handled it that fast. I mean, you had to watch her-" She abruptly stopped.

"I had to watch her get torn to bits," I finished for her, my teeth clenched and my voice scratchy.

"I'm so sorry," Katniss whispered. "I can't imagine what that must feel like."

"It's okay," I said, but who was I kidding? It wasn't okay that my sister was sent into an arena to kill other kids. It wasn't okay that someone killed my sister. It wasn't okay that all my sister was now was a bloody hunk of bones and meat.

"So how are you feeling?" Katniss said, obviously wanting to change the subject.

"Fine, considering I'm not in Heaven," I said.

Katniss smiled.

"What happened out there?" she asked.

I moaned and started to roll over, but the pain that shot up my shoulder stopped me.

"I stood up for a girl," I said, looking her straight in the eye. And then something suddenly occurred to me. I shot straight up despite the pain in my shoulder. "My family!"

"What about them?" Katniss asked, standing up.

"My family!" I shouted, starting to slide off the table I'd been laid on. "Where are they?!"

"I don't know," Katniss said. "You should really not walk. You're in too much pain."

"To heck with pain," I said, starting to wobble toward the door. "My family is more important."

But were they even still alive? I thought. I swung open the door and a cold blast of air blew my back.

"Wait!" Katniss shouted behind me. She caught up with me pretty fast, considering I was hobbling. "Melany, what's going on?"

"My family," was the only thing I could say. My heart pounded so hard and I was so terrified for my family that I didn't even feel the jarring pain in my shoulder. I soon stopped hobbling and just started running, no matter if my legs were tired or not. Katniss ran beside me, ever now and then looking worriedly over at me. It seemed to take hours to reach my house when it was really only five minutes. But when I got there, I swung open the door and stared into my house.

"Melany!" Manda exclaimed, running toward me. I breathed a sigh of relief and hugged her tight, tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Your arm!" my mom exclaimed.

I did a headcount and saw that everybody was still there. Everybody was still alive. I hugged Manda even tighter and I'm sure I soaked her shirt with tears.

"Melany," Manda said, lightly pulling away from me. "What's wrong?"

"You're all here," I whispered, pulling Becky and Lance in a tight hug. "You're all alright."

"Melany," my mom said worriedly. "What's wrong?"

"I'll explain later," I said, not at all wanting to tell her about my talk with Snow. I didn't want to tell anybody. I pulled away from Becky and Lance and looked up at Katniss.

"Thank you," I said. "Thank you so much for taking care of me."

"Anytime," Katniss said calmly, sounding not at all confused by my actions. "Your arm is bleeding again, though. We have to get you back to my mother."

"Melany, what is going on?" my mom asked sternly.

"Can they come along?" I asked Katniss, realizing that my mom would never stop questioning me. "I can explain it to everyone as your mom is working on my arm."

"Sure," Katniss said, nodding.

Miss Everdeen started to stick the needle into my arm and I grimaced. I started to tell the story from the beginning of when I'd been whipped and kept on telling them everything since then; even that I'd been hunting illegally. I stopped when I reached the part about being shot in the arm.

"And you've been keeping this inside you for this long?" my mom asked me. I nodded.

"How did you bear it?" Katniss asked. "The weight of everything?"

I shrugged, not really knowing the answer.

"Don't worry about us, Melany," my mom said. "We'll be okay. Just worry about yourself."

"But I can't do that, Mom," I said. "I've already lost Dad and Elissa. I can't lose you guys, too."

"We'll be okay," my mom said.

"Okay?" I repeated. "Nothing is ever okay."

I opened my eyes. Everybody else was asleep, which was odd. Katniss had sent me home with some pain killers and we'd all gone home and crawled into bed for the night.

I moaned slightly as I sat up and looked around the room. Everybody was there... except Becky. I crawled out of bed and looked around the house for her, but didn't find her anywhere. I slipped on my jacket and quickly put on my shoes and headed outside. Where was she? My arm hurt like heck but I tried my best to ignore it.

"Becky?" I whispered, hoping that she was near. There was no reply. I looked all around her house, but she wasn't anywhere in sight. I slowly headed toward the town square, careful not to be spotted by the peacekeepers. And there, to my horror, I saw a peacekeeper shove a little girl to the ground and pull out a gun.

"No!" I screamed, realizing that the girl was Becky. I started to run toward the peacekeeper, no longer worried about being seen.

"NO!" I screamed again, louder.

The peacekeeper raised his gun and aimed it at Becky.

"Please, no!" I screamed.

Becky looked up at me with her tear-soaked cheeks just as the peacekeeper pulled the trigger.

"NO!" I screamed, my heart dropping. Becky limply fell to the ground, blood pouring out of her head. I fell beside her and laid her lifeless body on my lap.

"No," I whispered.

The bullet had gone completely through her head. There was no way to save her. She was gone.

"This is what happens when you give people hope," the peacekeeper said, putting his gun away. He turned around and walked away, leaving me alone with the dead body of my little sister.


	12. Chapter XII

Peacekeepers soon came and reached for Becky.

"No!" I shouted, holding her lifeless body closer.

The Peacekeepers grabbed Becky and pulled her away from me.

"No, no, no!" I screamed, tears still falling. The peacekeeper that had killed Becky, the one who had whipped me, the one who had put a gun to my head two times, leaned down toward me and spoke.

"You can't tell anybody about what happened," he said. "If you tell anyone, they will know what President Snow has done and they will start an uprising."

So I was all alone to mourn for my sister. My mom said that she probably just slept walked and would wake up and come back.

But then days past... then weeks... and soon my mom had to come to the conclusion that Becky was dead.

Except it was worse for me. My mom could still hope that Becky was alive, but I'd seen Becky die and I knew she was dead. My mom didn't know that.

So I grieved alone for days, unable to let out all the tears I wanted to. I couldn't crawl into bed like I did when Elissa died because then my mom would know that something was up. She knew me; I never gave up hope. But for Becky, there was no hope.

I eventually had to let Becky go, as much as I hated to. I had to move on with life and fend for my family. What was left of it, anyway.

I walked toward the woods and slipped under the fence that was never electrocuted. I ran into the woods and grabbed my bow and quiver full of arrows from the log. I slipped my quiver onto my back and knocked an arrow, ready to fire at any animal that came my way.

As I crept through the woods, I heard something move. I stopped walking and listened again. Something was walking. Those aren't animal steps, I thought. They're too heavy. It was human footsteps. Somebody was in the forest!

Just as this realization came to me the person walked in front of me. I raised my bow and pulled back on the bowstring, ready to defend myself, when the person let out a laugh.

"Relax," the person said.

I looked at the person more clear and rolled my eyes. I put down my bow and gave him a glare.

"Thanks for scaring me to death, Gale," I said, eyeing him.

"You're not the only one that comes to the forest," he said, laughing.

"I have to get going," I said, not laughing.

"Hey, what's the matter?" Gale said, sensing something in my voice.

"Nothing," I said and started to walk away.

"Hey!" Gale said, running toward me and grabbing my arm to stop me from walking any further. "Come on, what's the matter?"

"I can't tell you," I said, gritting my teeth. "I can't tell anyone."

I yanked my arm away from him and started to run. I heard him running behind me but I took a lot of turns and hid behind quite a few trees before he finally lost me. I sighed as he ran past me hiding behind a tree. I sat down at the base of the tree and put my head in my hands.

"I can't do this anymore," I whispered to myself. But I have to, I thought. I have to take care of what little family I still have left. I breathed in slowly and contained myself. Then I got up and started to wander through the forest in search for squirrels. When I'd shot three of them, I decided it was time to head home. I walked through the forest, looking for the marking that Katniss had put on a tree so that I'd know when I was close to the fence. But I didn't see the marking anywhere. I whirled around in search for it but didn't see it. In fact, I didn't even recognize the part of the forest I was in at all.

"Oh no," I whispered. I was lost.

I knew that nobody would come for me for a long time. I usually stayed in the forest until nightfall just because it was so peaceful and I could relax. It was only midday, though, so nobody would think of coming for me until nightfall. And nightfall was when all the creatures came out...

I started to wander around a little bit more, hoping to somehow find the marker but I never did.

After hours of just wandering around, I decided to stop. I sat down by a tree and sighed. I'm an idiot, I thought. An absolute idiot. But the truth was, I was just broken.

After hours of sitting at the base of the tree, night started to fall. I heard crickets start chirping and looked around. I knocked an arrow on my bow, just in case something came at me. I got to my feet and looked at the horizon. The light was fading fast and soon it was completely dark. I heard an owl hoot and the crickets never stopped chirping. Right about this time my family would start to get suspicious and wonder where I was.

Would they come and find me, or just assume I had been hurt again and staying at Katniss's as her mother healed me? And if they did come for me, would they find me?

I sighed and rubbed my head, a million questions that had to be answered. My stomach rumbled and I realized something; my family wasn't going to eat. I hadn't traded in the squirrels at the market so how could they have gotten food?

This is all my fault, I thought. I heard something move and quickly pulled back on my bowstring in the direction of the movement. I heard a growl and knew that it wasn't my family coming to get me.

A bear started to run toward me, mouth open and teeth showing. It roared as it dashed toward me, and I quickly took aim and let go of the bowstring. My arrow flew through the air and landed in the chest of the bear. The bear collapsed to the ground and roared painfully. I quickly knocked another arrow in case there were more. I heard something move again and quickly pulled my bowstring back, ready for another round.

"Melany?" a voice whispered.

Katniss appeared from behind a tree and looked relieved when she saw me. I lowered my bow and ran toward her.

"You're alright!" Katniss exclaimed, hugging me. "Your family said that you hadn't come home and they got worried."

"I got lost," I said, feeling stupid.

"That's okay," Katniss said. "I got lost once too. The forest is pretty tricky. Anyway, I'm just glad that nothing got you before- what is that?"

I turned around and saw what she was looking at; the dead bear.

"A bear," I said, walking over to it and pulling out my arrow from it's chest. It had already died.

"You killed it?" Katniss asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Well at least you had your bow with you," Katniss said. "You'd be lunch right now if you didn't. Now come on, we have to get you back home."

"Wait," I said, grabbing my squirrels. "I have to trade these in. My family must be starving..."

"Oh no, they're alright," Katniss said. "My family shared some of our food with them. Right now you just have to get home. How long have you been out here?"

"Since noon," I said.

"Well, you must be bored out of your brain by now," Katniss said, smiling and leading me through the forest. "I marked the trees as I came to find you so if you ever get lost again you just find a marker and follow it."

"Thanks," I said.

So Katniss led me through the forest in the middle of the night and after a few minutes of wandering around we finally reached the fence.

"Think you can get home from here? I gotta get back home to my family," Katniss said.

"Yeah," I replied. "Thanks for finding me. I was afraid nobody ever would..."

"Welcome," Katniss said, grinning. "Hey, why were you out there in the first place? Gale said he tried talking to you and you just took off."

"It's nothing," I said, immediately locking down and not wanting to speak of Becky.

"Nothing means it's something," Katniss said. "Come on, tell me."

I sighed.

"You can't tell anyone," I said. "Not Gale, not my family, not anyone. Understand?"

"Alright," Katniss said.

I'm making a huge mistake, I thought. But I went ahead and told her anyway.

"President Snow killed my sister," I blurted out.

"I know, he killed Elissa," Katniss said softly.

"I mean, my other sister," I said, my voice starting to quiver. "Well, he killed Elissa too, but now he's killed B-B-Becky."

And as soon as I got my sentence out, I burst into tears. I hadn't been able to tell anyone about what actually happened and all I could do was keep it inside of me. But now that I had let it all out, the memories of watching Becky crumble to the ground filled my head.

"You don't know for sure if she's dead," Katniss said. "She just slept walked, didn't she?"

"I woke up one night," I said, trying to contain myself. "And she wasn't there. I went outside to the town square and I saw a peacekeeper shoot her in the head. The peacekeeper told me not to say anything or else President Snow would kill somebody else in my family."

Tears were already streaming down my cheeks.

"You... you saw Becky die?" Katniss whispered.

I nodded and stifled a sob.

"I'm so sorry," Katniss said, pulling me into a hug. "I-I didn't know."

"It's not your fault," I whispered pulling away from Katniss gently. "Thank you for being here for me, though. That's all I could ask for."

"Your welcome," Katniss said. "I won't tell anybody. I promise. But just know that if you ever need to talk about anything, I'm here. Alright?"

"Thanks," I said, sniffling. "I should probably get back home now."

"Yeah," Katniss said, starting to walk toward her house. "Sure you don't need any help getting home?"

"I'll be fine," I said, smiling. "Thank you... for everything."

Katniss smiled and waved goodbye as she headed toward her house. I headed toward my house and dried the tears on the way. I lightly knocked on the door when I reached my house and the door immediately swung open and my mom pulled me into a hug.

"I just got lost," I said calmly, knowing that she would question why I was out so long.

"Well, you're okay now, aren't you?" she asked.

"I'm fine," I replied.

And that's when I realized it: I wasn't fine. Not at all. But sometimes a lie was better than the truth.

I awoke to the sound of the front door closing. My eyes opened and I looked around my room. Lance and Manda were still in bed sleeping, but my mom was nowhere in sight. I crawled out of bed, immediately remembering the night Becky died. She'd disappeared in the middle of the night, and now my mom was disappearing. I quickly slipped on my boots and jacket and ran out into the night. I saw movement out of the corner of my eye and ran toward it.

"Mom?" I whispered, reaching out for the person.

The person whirled around and grabbed my arm. It wasn't my mom; it was a peacekeeper.

"What are you doing out so late at night?" the peacekeeper asked.

"I-I-I-" I stuttered. "I'm just..."

"Spit it out!" the peacekeeper shouted at me. I couldn't tell him that I was looking for my mom; he would get suspicious.

"I'm looking for the Capitol," I said groggily, suddenly getting an idea.

"What?" the peacekeeper asked, obviously confused.

"Do you know which way the Capitol went? I saw it walking away and I was so confused," I said groggily again.

The peacekeeper blinked and stared at me, then realized it.

"You're asleep," he muttered. "Where do you live?"

"District 12?" I asked as if I didn't know.

"I mean, which house?" the peacekeeper asked.

"The one in District 12," I said. I didn't want him to take me back home, because then he would see that my mom was missing.

"Just get home yourself, then," the peacekeeper said gruffly, letting go of my arm and shoving me forward. I stumbled forcefully and then pretended to regain my balance and walk back toward my house. Guess a peacekeeper would rather have me wandering around District 12 then take me back to my home himself, I thought, almost smiling but not quite.

When I was out of the peacekeepers view I walked quickly through District 12, looking for my mom. I crept to the town square and, to my relief, she wasn't there. I hadn't heard a gunshot or anything so maybe she was still alive.

I headed back to my house, wondering if perhaps she'd gone back. I opened the door to my house slowly and saw that my mom still wasn't back. Where is she? I thought. I'd wandered around nearly the whole area that we lived in and she was nowhere. There's nothing else I can do, I thought, though I wanted to do so much more. I wanted to find her, to make sure she was okay, but there was no way. I would have to wait it out and hope she returned in the morning. I slowly crawled into bed, though I knew I wouldn't sleep.

It had been a week since my mom had disappeared. Within a few days, everybody had found out that she'd disappeared. Mostly everyone was saying that she'd run off to the woods, but I wouldn't believe that. I couldn't. She would never abandon us, especially since Becky disappeared.

But it didn't matter what I thought. Soon the people from the Community Home came to take me, Lance, and Manda. We were taken from our home and placed in the Community Home. The people who worked at the Community Home rarely let any of us out, and when we did get out it was only for school. They didn't get a lot of food, so frequently we went to bed hungry. I couldn't go out and hunt for food, so I couldn't feed Lance or Manda or any of the other kids.

I'd lost so much and seen things I would never be able to unsee. I'd lost my dad first in a mine crash. I remember waiting for him to come out of the rubble of the mine but he never did.

Then I'd lost Elissa in the games. I remember seeing the District 2 girl take out the knife and work on her. Then I'd lost Becky to the peacekeepers. I remember seeing the bullet go through her head. And now I'd lost my mom. I'd lost nearly everything, though I was determined to keep Manda and Lance safe.


	13. Chapter XIII

I walked into school and started to walk toward my first class when two girls stepped in front of me.  
"I heard about your mom," one of the girls in front of me said. "It's a shame."  
"Leave me alone," I muttered, trying to push past them. They stood firm.  
"But not as much of a shame as what happened to your sister, Becky," the other girl said. I clenched my fist, wanting to throw a punch at her.  
"Leave me alone," I said again.  
"Well, I think it's more of a shame what happened to her father," the other girl said, grinning slightly. Both of my hands clenched.  
"Leave. Me. Alone," I said sternly, this time shoving past them. As I walked away from them they didn't stop me.  
"But the biggest shame is what happened to Elissa," one of the girls called after me, making me stop dead in my tracks. "I nearly went deaf with all her screaming."  
I snapped. I whirled around and threw a hard punch at the one who had commented on Elissa and she collapsed to the ground. The other girl ran away as I picked up the girl I had just punched. I pinned her against the wall and threw another punch at her face. Blood ran out of her nose and she was too shocked to defend herself. I threw multiple punches at her and paid no attention to the crowd of kids that had formed.  
"Stop this!" a voice in the crowd shouted. I kept on punching her, anger boiling in me. Arms grabbed me from behind and dragged me away. I screamed and lashed at the girl but the hands were too strong. As I was dragged away from the girl and into a room I tried kicking the adult, but failed. The door closed and I was laid on the floor, still kicking.  
"Melany!" a stern voice said. I stopped kicking and looked up at the person who had spoken, anger still boiling inside me. Sweat ran down my forehead and my hand was covered in blood.  
"What's gotten into you?!" the principal said.  
"She talked about Elissa," I said through clenched teeth. The principal's face softened slightly, but was still firm.  
"You have to learn how to deal with your emotions," he said. "You can't just lash out at people."  
"She talked about my dad... and my mom... and Becky... and then Elissa," I whispered.  
"People are cruel," the principal said. "But you don't have to be cruel back."  
I looked down, realizing that what I'd done was wrong. But that still didn't make me want to go back out there and punch her some more. All was silent for a few moments.  
"I don't know what to do with you," the principal finally said. "You've been through so much it doesn't seem right to punish you. But I have to do something or else everybody will think it's okay to punch other kids."  
I gritted my teeth, knowing that he was right.  
"Do what you have to do," I muttered just loud enough for him to hear. Everything was silent as he pondered what to do.  
"Alright," he said eventually. "You're going to go out there and scrub the blood off the walls and floor. After you're done with that, you will go and apologize to the girl."  
"Apologize?" I said, disgusted.  
"Yes," the principal said, looking me in the eye.  
"She doesn't deserve an apology!" I exclaimed. "If anything, I do!"  
As soon as I said it, I wanted to take it back. Realization came to me: I did not deserve an apology. I didn't even deserve to live. It was my fault that I hadn't volunteered for Elissa. It was my fault that Becky was dead. It was my fault, probably, that my mother was gone. It was my fault that I'd punched the girl. The realization of everything hit me all at once and tears welled up in my eyes. But instead of holding them back like I regularly did, I let them poor out one after another. My whole body shook as one tear fell after another. I heard footsteps come toward me but didn't look up. I didn't even look up when I felt arms wrap around me.  
"Shh," the principal said, holding me as I cried. "It's okay."  
There it was again. Those familiar words; "it's okay". But everything wasn't okay. It never was.

I wiped down the dried blood with my wet rag. The Principal had let me clean it after all the other kids had left so they wouldn't have to see me. It took a bit of scrubbing, but I finally got all the blood off. I sighed and leaned against the wall. I heard footsteps and peered around. I was supposed to be the only one in the building...  
"Hey!" a voice shouted, making me jump. Arms grabbed me and hauled me to my feet. I stared into the eyes of a peacekeeper.  
"What?" I asked.  
"What are you doing here so late?" the peacekeeper ordered.  
"Cleaning," I said vaguely.  
"You're not supposed to be here after hours," the peacekeeper said.  
"I got permission to," I said.  
"Do you have a slip?" the peacekeeper asked me.  
"... no," I said hesitantly. The principal never said anything about a piece of paper...  
"Then you're coming with me," the principal said, dragging me away. I dropped my wet rag and tugged on my arm.  
"I got permission!" I exclaimed. "Let me go!"  
The peacekeeper said nothing else as he dragged me out of the building and toward the Justice Building. A shiver went up my spine as I was dragged through the familiar doorway. Every time I looked at the Justice Building I remembered the horrid smell of blood on Snow's breath. The peacekeeper dragged me into a room and threw me into a cage. He locked the door and started to walk away.  
"Hey!" I shouted. "You're just going to leave me here?!"  
"Just overnight until I can get this sorted out with President Snow," the peacekeeper said.  
My heart sunk. President Snow. He'd think I was causing trouble. And there was nothing I could do to save my family if I was locked in a cage.  
The peacekeeper left and locked the door to the Justice Building as he left. I was alone in the dark in my cell, the only light coming from a window above me. I ran to the front of the cell and pulled on the bars, hoping that I could break them. But of course I couldn't. I plopped down and buried my head in my hands. This was my fault, too.

I awoke to the sound of the Justice Building's double doors opening. Three peacekeepers trudged into the room I was in, one of them dragging a little boy behind him.  
"Lance," I whispered, my eyes large and full of fear.  
One peacekeeper grabbed Lance's right hand, another his left. The third peacekeeper drew a sword and my heart fell.  
"No!" I shouted. "Leave him alone! Kill me, kill me!"  
I grabbed the bars of my cage and shook them. I banged on them and screamed as loud as I could.  
"KILL ME!" I screamed. "LEAVE HIM ALONE!"  
Lance looked up at me, his lip quivering. The peacekeeper plunged the sword through Lance's stomach and I let out a scream.  
"No!" I screamed, tears falling. "No, no, no!"  
The peacekeeper took his sword out of Lance's stomach and Lance fell to the ground unmoving. A peacekeeper walked over to my cage and unlocked it. I immediately rushed toward Lance and took his pulse. There was nothing. I sobbed and held Lance in my arms.  
"President Snow orders your release," a peacekeeper said, reaching for Lance. I held Lance closer, but the peacekeeper grabbed him and took him away from me. I screamed and lunged at the peacekeeper, but the other two held me back. They dragged me out of the building and away from Lance, and then dropped me at the base of the stairs and closed the Justice Building's doors. I laid there on the ground and cried. It was all my fault, everything was. There was nothing I could do to take back what had been done. Nearly everything was silent, the only sound to be heard was my crying. I'd cried so much over the months that I thought I couldn't cry anymore. Turns out I was wrong.


	14. Chapter XIV

I made Manda sleep next to me in the Community Home. I'd lost my father, I'd lost Elissa, I'd lost Becky, I'd lost my mom, and now I'd lost Lance. Manda was the only loved one that I had left.  
I never told her what happened to Lance. I didn't want her to know that her brother was dead. I didn't want her to know that both of her sisters were dead, or that her father was dead, or that her mother was probably dead. I didn't want her to know that every move I made might cost her her life.  
"Melany?" Manda whispered to me one night in the Community Home. "I'm hungry."  
I could tell she'd been hungry before, but she'd never said anything about it until then.  
"I know," I said, leaning over and kissing her on the forehead. "It'll be okay."  
Those words, "it'll be okay", were everywhere it seemed. They were full of comfort... and lies.  
I couldn't stand to watch Manda starve, so one night I snuck out of the Community Home and past the peacekeepers. I headed outside and to the woods. I slipped under the fence, got to the woods, and pulled my bow and quiver of arrows out of the log. It would be hard to hunt in the night, but at least then Manda wouldn't starve.  
I knocked and arrow and walked quietly through the woods, looking for any kind of animal. There were probably still some people left at the Hob, and they wouldn't tell anybody that I was out of the Community Home.  
I heard leaves rustle and turned around quickly, bowstring already pulled back. I heard leaves rustle to my left and quickly whirled my bow around to face that direction. I shot an arrow blindly and heard some sort of screech. I put my bow down and carefully walked over in the direction of the animal. I looked down and saw that I'd struck a squirrel with an arrow. I breathed a sigh of relief. I'd thought it was a bear...  
I picked up the dead squirrel and took my arrow out of it. It was only one squirrel, but I didn't want to stay out in the woods in the dark for too long. I ran out of the woods and swung under the fence, then headed for the Hob. I carefully avoided the peacekeepers as I walked through the Hob. I walked over to the man that sold me bread frequently and handed him the squirrel. He looked at me as if wondering what I was doing out so late, but didn't say a word. He took the squirrel from me and handed me a loaf of bread.  
"Thank you," I whispered, taking the loaf.  
"Thank you," the man said, grinning. "You best be getting on now. The peacekeepers are going to come around her at any minute."  
"Thanks," I said, nodding at him and taking off. Just as I slipped out of the Hob a hand seized my arm. Without even looking, I swung my elbow up and knocked the person who had grabbed me in the face. The person let go of my arm and I ran, not letting them get a view of my face. I had to get the bread to Manda and I had to keep her safe.  
I ran to the Community Home and slipped back in, then ran to the room where Manda and I slept. I lightly shook her awake and handed her the bread.  
"Eat it fast," I whispered, not wanting anybody to smell it and wonder what was going on. Manda's eyes grew large and she scarfed the bread down.  
"Where'd you get it?" she whispered.  
"Where I usually do," I said, not wanting to tell her the specifics. "Now get to bed."

First thing next morning we were sent out to school. Manda and I always walked together, mostly because I wanted to keep her safe. When we were about halfway there, a peacekeeper stepped in front of us. I immediately grabbed Manda's arm and pulled her behind me.  
"What do you want?" I asked, trying not to let my panic seep through my voice.  
"You were out late last night," the peacekeeper said. "Past curfew."  
I looked at his face and saw a large bruise on his cheek. I recalled the night before when I'd whacked someone in the face. This was him.  
"No I wasn't," I said, trying to look as confused as I could.  
"Don't play that game with me," the peacekeeper said. "You were out late. I saw you. And you punched me."  
"Elbowed, not punched," I said before I could stop myself. The peacekeeper's eyes widened and I swallowed the knot that had formed in my throat.  
"If you weren't there," the peacekeeper started to say. "Then how do you know that you elbowed me?"  
_Idiot, idiot, idiot!_ I thought angrily to myself. I bit my lip.  
"Melany, what's going on?" Manda's voice said behind me. I turned to look at her.  
"It'll be okay," I said, leaning down as if to kiss her on the cheek. But instead I leaned into her ear and whispered. "When I touch your arm, you run to the fence and into the woods. Wait for someone to come and get you." I pulled away from her and smiled as if I'd told her nothing. I turned back to the peacekeeper and looked at him sternly.  
"The reason I know if I elbowed you or not," I started to say pacing around Manda as if I were bored. "Is because I've elbowed you before."  
The peacekeeper blinked, obviously not believing me.  
"However," I continued. "The reason I snuck out is because I was doing something for you."  
"Me?" the peacekeeper asked.  
"Yes," I said. "I snuck into the Hob to get you this."  
I reached into my bag and pulled out my English book. I handed it to him and smiled, as if I were truly giving him something. He flipped open the book and began reading. I lightly touched Manda on the arm and she immediately took off. I blocked her view from the peacekeeper as much as I could and tried to keep him interested in the book.  
"This looks like a school book," he said, snapping it shut and giving me a glare.  
"It is," I said, still trying to block his view of Manda running away. "I wanted to give it to you."  
"You have to keep your school book," the peacekeeper said, slamming the book into my hands. "For school."  
"Yup, that's what schoolbooks are for," I said. The peacekeeper's eyes suddenly widened and he started to run.  
"Hey!" he shouted. "Come back here!"  
I quickly chased after him, knowing he'd spotted Manda. I saw Manda in the distance, running for the fence. I dropped my bag and ran faster than I'd ever thought I'd run before. I caught up with the peacekeeper and jumped onto him. We both fell to the ground, him more stunned than me. I clawed his face and started punching him. He would not take my sister, the only family I had left. He grabbed my fist just as I was about to throw another punch and twisted it. I let out a scream and he pinned me to the ground. My wrist hurt like heck, and I assumed he'd broken it.  
"You're more trouble than you're worth," the peacekeeper said, punching me in the face. Blood ran down his nose from me punching him and his cheek was split open from my nails. He punched my face harder, and I felt blood run out of it and into my mouth. I spit it out and into his face, and that only made him madder. He picked me up and threw me against a wall hard, my head ramming against it. My ears rang from the impact but soon cleared. He punched me over and over again and it felt like someone was hitting me with a brick every time. I heard a commotion and focused on that, not wanting to focus on the man hitting me. Behind the peacekeeper were two or three peacekeepers, who were running over to us. They pulled the peacekeeper that was punching me away and I collapsed to the ground, my face bloody and hurting like heck. But, ignoring the pain in my face, I immediately got up and started running. Before I could get far, however, a peacekeeper grabbed me and pulled me back. I elbowed him in the stomach and kicked him but he wouldn't let go.  
"No!" I screamed as he dragged me away.  
As I was dragged through the streets I noticed Katniss staring at me. Maybe I couldn't go and find Manda, but Katniss could...  
"Katniss!" I screamed, trying to run toward her but unable to because of the peacekeeper. She looked at me with sadness in her eyes. I knew she couldn't help me and she knew it too... but she could help Manda.  
"The woods!" I screamed at her. "THE WOODS!"  
I couldn't tell her the specifics because than the peacekeepers would know, but I hoped and prayed she'd go to the woods and find Manda.  
Katniss looked at me confusedly, but then nodded her head slowly. The peacekeeper dragged me into the justice building and locked me in the familiar cell. I banged my head against the bars and pulled on them, but, just like before, they wouldn't break. I sat down and leaned against the wall and cried, but quickly tried to stop. I was acting as if Manda was dead, but she wasn't. _She'll live,_ I tried to reassure myself. _She'll be okay._  
I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep. Sleep was the only place where I didn't have to worry. But sleep never came; I was too worried. I knew that as long as I laid there worrying, I would never be able to protect Manda. I looked over at the bars of the cage and grabbed two of the bars with my hands. I breathed in deeply and then rammed my head hard against the bars. My head buzzed and I collapsed to the ground, everything fading to black.

My eyes opened slowly. My ears rang and my head hurt like heck (not to mention my face). Peacekeepers were staring at me. I recognized them from the few nights before. They were the ones that had killed Lance.  
"She knocked herself out?" one of the peacekeepers whispered.  
"I know; we didn't have to do anything," the other one whispered.  
"I can hear you, you know," I said, sitting up and rubbing my head.  
"That girl you were talking to," the peacekeeper started to say, ignoring my statement. "The one with the braid? She came back a few minutes later with a girl."  
She found Manda! I thought, relief filling me.  
"But, of course, we had to take the girl," the peacekeeper said. The relief disappeared and was replaced with absolute horror. Two other peacekeepers burst into the room, Manda wriggling around in their arms.  
"Let me go!" she screamed, pulling and yanking. She wasn't strong enough.  
"Manda!" I exclaimed, running to the front of the cage and reaching my hands through, trying to touch her. I couldn't reach far enough.  
"You're quite the troublemaker, aren't you, Melany?" the peacekeeper said, pacing around the room. "President Snow warned you; he told you what would happen to your family if you didn't keep things low. I'm afraid that fight with the peacekeeper you had wasn't keeping things low, nor was sneaking out in the middle of the night."  
The peacekeepers forced Manda to the ground and my mouth went dry. Each peacekeeper took out clubs and I stared at Manda, who had tears running down her cheeks.  
"Melany," she whispered.  
"Do it," the peacekeeper said. The peacekeepers started beating Manda with their clubs, and I let out a scream.  
"No!" I screamed, shaking the bars of my cage. "Let her go! Leave her alone!"  
The peacekeepers beat on little Manda and she writhed and screamed, trying to escape but couldn't.  
"Let her go!" I shouted, yanking as hard as I could on the cage's bars. But they didn't let her go. I watched in horror as they beat on her multiple times. I heard her screaming my names multiple times, but I could do nothing but watch. Her screams finally died down and the peacekeepers stopped beating her. They dragged her bloody and mutilated body out of the room and the peacekeeper motioned for someone to come in. Tears streamed down my cheeks and the smell of blood filled the room. President Snow walked in and looked me in the eye.  
"I warned you," he said, shaking his head.  
"You killed them," I said, my voice no more than a whisper. "You killed them all."  
"Not all of them," Snow said. "Your father's death was just an accident, as was Elissa's."  
"You killed them all," I said, my teeth gritted. "If you weren't so stupid none of this would have ever happened!"  
"Be careful what you say, girl," Snow said, eyes full of fury.  
"You can't hurt me anymore!" I shouted at him, my whispering voice gone. "You've killed everything I love! You can't do anything to me anymore!"  
"Ah, but I can," Snow said. "However, I won't. Killing you would just create a martyr."  
The peacekeeper unlocked my cage and dragged me out.  
"So instead I'll send you someplace where nobody will listen to you," Snow said. "Where you can create a new life."  
The peacekeeper started to drag me out of the room.  
"The Capitol," were the last words I heard Snow say before I was dragged out of the Justice Building with tears still running down my cheeks.


	15. Chapter XV

My father was dead. My mother was dead. My big sister was dead. My two little sisters were dead. My little brother was dead. They were all dead, dead, dead! I rammed my head against the window of the train. I wanted to be dead.  
The train screeched to a halt, a woman's voice on the PA saying "Welcome to the Capitol". The doors swooshed open and the peacekeepers led me out of the train. They had to handcuff me before I got on the train because I had been fighting them. I gave one of them a black eye and another a nasty gash on his face.  
"You're free to go where you please," a peacekeeper said, taking off my handcuffs. I rubbed my wrists and looked up at him, confused.  
"What do you mean?" I asked him. "Aren't you going to keep me prisoner somewhere or something?"  
"No," the peacekeeper said. "If you do anything bad here, the Capitol citizens will just laugh and forget about it. There's nothing you can do wrong here, so go on and have fun. Just make sure not to break any major rules."  
And with that, the peacekeepers boarded the train and left me alone. I looked around at the Capitol people. They had weird hair and clothes and tattoos. I sighed and started to walk around, examining all the stores as I passed. I reached into my pocket and saw a card that one of the peacekeepers had given me before I got off the train. It was pretty much blank, the only words on it being "NEW CITIZEN". I stuck it back in my pocket and continued walking around. My heart felt empty, I felt lifeless. My eyes were still wet from crying so much and my throat was scratchy from screaming so much. I breathed in the strange smell of the Capitol and continued walking, not wanting to think about my family at all. They were all dead, and I was pretty much dead myself. I had nothing left to love, nothing left to care for. I read a store's name and immediately stopped dead in my tracks.  
"Permanent Hair Coloring" the sign read. _I need to forget my family,_ I thought to myself. _If I don't, I'll just be empty for the rest of my life. I'm sure President Snow is watching me and if I do anything drastic he's sure to do something even worse. I need to forget my family... but first I have to forget myself._  
I walked into the Permanent Hair Coloring salon and immediately a man ran up to me.  
"Welcome to Permanent Hair Coloring, where we color your hair permanently," he said, his blue spiky hair sparkling. "What can I do for you today, madam?"  
"I want to color my hair," I said.  
"Of course!" the man said. "And what color do you want it?"  
"Red," I said. "Dark red."  
_Dark red,_ I thought. _Like blood. Like Becky's blood when she was shot in the- stop!_ I squeezed my eyes shut and blocked out the memory of watching Becky get shot. I had to forget them, therefor I had to forget myself.  
"Brilliant choice!" the blue haired man said, grinning like a fool. "If you will follow me, I'll get you started!"  
I was led into a room with multiple chairs. He sat me down in one and then came over with a tube of hair coloring. He laid me back in my chair and rinsed my hair with spray-on-water and then squirted the tube of coloring into my hair. I closed my eyes as he massaged my head and rubbed the coloring into it. After putting in the coloring, he took out some sort of spray and sprayed my hair.  
"Alrighty," he said, putting the bottle of spray away. I opened my eyes a stared into the mirror. My hair was dark red and I looked... amazing. I almost didn't recognize myself.  
"It's wonderful," I said, trying to smile. "Thank you."  
"Of course," he said. "Now, how will you be paying for it?"  
"I... um..." I stuttered. Then I remembered the card. I pulled it out of my pocket and handed it to the man. He read it over quickly and nodded.  
"Oh, a new citizen?" he asked.  
"Yeah," I said.  
"Welcome to the Capitol!" he said, grinning.  
"Thanks; it's pretty cool so far," I said.  
"I hope you enjoy the rest of your stay!" the man said, helping me up from my chair and handing me back my card. "And I hope you enjoy your new hair!"  
"Thanks; I'm sure I will," I said.  
I headed outside and looked around again at the other stores. I saw a tattoo place and bit my lip._ I probably shouldn't,_ I thought, but then started to change my mind. _I do need to change myself..._ I headed toward the tattoo shop without another thought and walked in.  
"Hello!" a man with multiple tattoos said. "What can I do for you today?"  
"I want a tattoo," I said, walking up to him.  
"What would you like it to be of?" the man asked me.  
I pondered the thought for a moment, and finally made up my mind.  
"I want it to be of a bow and arrow," I said. "I want the arrow knocked on the bow and I would like it on my shoulder, please."  
"Alright, one tattoo coming right up!" the man said, smiling. He led me to a chair and took out the needle. "This won't hurt a bit." He rubbed some sort of cream on my shoulder and then started to draw on my shoulder. And he was right; I didn't feel anything.  
"How come it doesn't hurt?" I asked, always thinking that tattoos would hurt.  
"The cream makes your arm go numb," the man explained, drawing carefully on my arm. After drawing out the main lines, he added some color in and then stepped back. I looked at my tattoo in the mirror and my mouth fell open in shock.  
"It's beautiful," I breathed, staring at it.  
"I'm glad you like it," the man said, smiling. "Is there any other tattoo you'd like today?"  
I looked at myself in the mirror. I'd only planned on getting one, but it looked so beautiful...  
"No thanks," I said, not wanting to go overboard like most of the Capitol citizens.  
"Alright," the man said. "Payment?"  
"Does this work?" I asked, handing him the card the peacekeeper had handed me.  
"Sure," the man said, taking the card and scanning it then handing it back to me. "Welcome to the Capitol; enjoy your stay!"  
"Thanks!" I said as I headed out of the store.  
After getting my tattoo I headed to some clothing stores and bought a new wardrobe. By the time i had finished shopping, it was already growing dark. I headed to a hotel and handed the man at the desk my card, he scanned it, and gave me keys to the room I'd be staying in. I headed up the elevator and into the hallway. I found my room number and put in the key, turned the handle, and walked in. My mouth dropped open and I stared into the beautiful, lush room. I slowly closed the door behind me and hopped onto the big, soft bed. I breathed in the smell of roses and slipped off my bed and walked over to a mirror. I looked into the mirror and my mouth fell open even wider. I didn't even recognize myself. I looked completely different with my Capitol dress, shoes, and red hair. I looked like I was born in the Capitol instead of District 12. I shook my head and headed into the shower. I let the warm water wash over my body and stayed in there for at least an hour. After I was done I hopped out of the shower and slipped on a nightgown. I turned off the lights and hopped onto the bed. I pulled the soft covers over my body and closed my eyes. I was no longer the poor girl from District 12 who had lost everyone she'd loved. I was the new girl from the Capitol who got tattoos and was fearless. I closed my eyes and almost let out a smile. President Snow couldn't break me if I was already broken. I had lost everything and gained everything. By losing my family, President Snow could no longer hurt me. I was free.


	16. Chapter XVI

My eyes opened slowly. The strange smell of the Capitol filled my nostrils immediately. I sat up quickly, wondering where I was and why. Something orange fell over my eyes and I quickly brushed it away. Then I realized it was my hair. Then I remembered I was in the Capitol. I breathed a sigh of relief and rolled out of bed. I hopped in the shower and tried all the different options, then I dried off and slipped on a yellow Capitol dress. Blue sparkles faded out to the bottom of it. For once, I looked my normal age. But I didn't like that. I quickly took out some dark red lipstick that I had bought the day before and put it on my lips. I looked in the mirror and breathed a sigh of relief. I looked like my old self.

"Old self," I said happily. Then the happiness turned to horror. "No!" I washed off the red lipstick and looked in the mirror again. I didn't want to be my old self; I wanted to be my new self. I wanted to be the Capitol citizen that hadn't lost her entire family. I shook my head and walked out of the bathroom, lipstick no longer on. I headed out of the hotel and outside. Capitol people were walking and talking in their strange accent. I started walking forward when someone caught my eye. I looked over at the little girl who looked to be ten years old. She had red straight hair and bangs that were just above her eyes. She was laughing and wearing a bright pink dress. She looked just like Manda...

"Woah!" a voice shouted in front of me, and I suddenly ended up on the ground. I moaned and sat up. On the floor beside me was a Capitol boy.

"I'm sorry," I said, realizing I had run straight into him when I'd been looking at the girl.

"It's fine; I fall all the time," the boy said, grunting as he stood up. He reached his hand down and helped me up. "Hey; I don't think I've seen you around here before. You new?"

"Yeah; I became a Capitol citizen yesterday," I said.

"Cool," the boy said. "What's your name?"

I was about to tell him Melany when I remembered that I was going to live a new life; to forget my family, I had to forget myself.

"Lavinia," I said, for once actually smiling. "My name is Lavinia."


	17. Chapter XVII

"I'm Alexander," the Capitol boy said, shaking my hand.

"What's up with your hair?" I said without thinking.

"What?" Alexander asked.

"I mean, it looks... normal," I said, cringing. "Sorry. I blurt stuff out a lot..."

"It's fine," Alexander said, smiling. "Yeah; I don't really like Capitol hair. It's strange, I know, but I don't."

"I don't think it's strange," I said. "I think it's actually sorta cool that you don't like it."

"Well, at least somebody doesn't think I'm weird," Alexander said, smiling broadly.

"So... were you born here?" I asked.

"Yeah," Alexander said. "Well, not really. I mean, I was born in District 12 but when I was two years old President Snow let my family move here."

"That's cool," I said, wondering why on earth President Snow would do such a thing. "I'm from District 12, too."

"Really?" Alexander said. "That's cool."

"Yeah," I said. "Small world."

We stood there in silence for a moment.

"Well... I best be going," I said, trying to get out of the awkward moment. "I mean, I don't really have anywhere to go, but... ya know..."

"I get it," Alexander said, grinning. "But hey, if you don't have anything to do, want me to show you around?"

I hesitated for a moment. Could I really trust him?

"Sure," I said, smiling slightly.

"Alright, first thing you need to know is that everything around here is a little bit crazy compared to District 12," Alexander said.

"Yeah, I sort of noticed that," I said, smiling.

Show Alexander showed me around the Capitol. We walked around all day and he pointed out his favorite shops and people. Soon we reached a large house that was painted all sorts of different colors.

"And this is where I live," Alexander said, smiling.

"Wow," I said. "It's... bright."

"As I said, the Capitol can be a bit crazy," Alexander said, laughing.

"It's sort of nice, though," I said.

"Well, I'm glad you like it," Alexander said. "Hey, want to meet my family? They're sort of normal compared to the regular Capitol citizens."

"Sure... I mean, if you want to," I said.

"Of course," Alexander said. "I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want you to meet them."

He took my hand and I blushed. He led me to the door of the brightly colored rainbow house and opened up the door.

"Mom! Dad!" he called. "There's someone I want you to meet!"

A woman with bright blue curl hair appeared and smiled when she saw me. Then a man with bright yellow hair appeared and gave me a questioning look.

"Who's this?" he asked.

"I'm Mel-Lavinia," I said, catching myself at the last moment.

"Melavinia?" the man asked.

"Just Lavinia," I said, blushing.

"Oh," the man said, walking over and shaking my hand. "Nice to meet you, Lavinia."

The woman walked over and gave me a hug. I didn't really hug back; just sort of sat there. Why is this stranger hugging me? I thought. She pulled away and grinned at me. I slightly smiled at her.

"Oh, you must come and eat with us," she said.

"Oh, I couldn't," I said, not really wanting to stay with his parents. If this is what he considered normal, I was afraid to meet any other Capitol citizens.

"I insist!" Alexander's mother said.

So they sat me down in a fancy table and chair and served me steaming plates of food. I tried to eat slowly, but it was hard because I'd never seen so much good food in my life.

"She's a new citizen," Alexander explained as we all ate, then told his parents that he'd showed me around the Capitol. I picked up a glass of water that was in front of me and started drinking.

"What a lovely day you all must have had!" his mother exclaimed. "Now, Lavinia, what do you think of my son? Quite the handsome fellow, isn't he?"

She winked and water flew out of my mouth and all over the table.

"Mom!" Alexander exclaimed.

"What?" his mother asked innocently.

"I'm sorry," I said, taking out a napkin and starting to dab the water that had flown out of my mouth. "I-I didn't-"

"She's just a friend!" Alexander exclaimed. "I just met her, anyway!"

"Well, I was just asking," his mother said, crossing her arms, then noticed me. "Oh, that's alright dear. We'll get the Avox to clean that up."

A girl wearing dark red lipstick walked into the room. She started to dab at the water that I had spit out. I took out a napkin and began to help her.

"Oh no, dear!" Alexander's mother exclaimed. "Let the Avox do it! That's what they're for."

"Pardon?" I asked.

"Avox's are sort of like servants," Alexander exclaimed. I looked over at what they called an Avox and saw that she was swallowing weirdly.

"Why is she swallowing weird?" I asked before thinking. Silence. I cringed and wanted to be anywhere but in the room.

"It's okay," Alexander said, realizing that I was uncomfortable. "You've never been here before, after all. Avox's are traitors of the Capitol. They... um... have their tongues cut out as punishment and then are servants for Capitol people."

"They have their tongues cut out?" I asked. "Isn't that a bit drastic?"

"Well, they are traitors..." Alexander's father muttered.

We ate in silence for the last few minutes.

"Well, I best be going," I finally said.

"Let me walk you home," Alexander said, jumping up from his seat.

"I'll be fine," I said.

"You don't know the way," Alexander said. "The Capitol can get very confusing."

"... fine," I said, knowing that without him I would surely get lost.

So he helped me walk home. Just as I was about to enter the hotel, he grabbed my arm lightly.

"Hey," he said. "I'm glad we got to hang out today. It was cool."

"I am too," I said, smiling. I lightly tugged on my arm. He hesitated, but let it go slowly. "I hope we see each other again soon!"

"Me too," he said. "And Lavinia?"

"Yeah?" I asked, turning around.

Alexander stared at me for a few seconds.

"Enjoy the Capitol," he finally said, turning around and walking away. I shrugged and headed into the Capitol and into my warm, soft sheets. The Capitol was interesting, very interesting indeed; servants who had had their tongues cut out, crazy hair, and weird houses. I was hoping that I'd get used to it, but I had a feeling I wouldn't.


	18. Chapter XVIII

The next day I ended up running into Alexander... again.

"Hey," he said, getting up from the ground.

"Hi," I said, embarrassed that I'd run into him again. This time I'd seen a girl that looked like Elissa. "Sorry about running into you again."

"It's okay," Alexander said, smiling and helping me up. "So, I was wondering if you wanted to do something today."

"What?" I said.

"I was wondering if you wanted to do something," Alexander repeated.

"Like what?" I asked.

"Whatever you'd like to do," Alexander said.

"I haven't really been here long," I said. "Where's a usually good place to go?"

"There's all sorts of places," Alexander said. "Want me to show you?"

"Sure," I said, smiling.

So Alexander and I went to all sorts of places. First, the tattoo shop. I got a tattoo of an arrow that went from my shoulder down to my elbow. Coming out of the tip of the arrow were swirls.

"That's an interesting tattoo," Alexander said, sitting down and getting ready for his tattoo.

"Thanks," I said, hoping that "interesting" meant good.

"So you like archery?" he asked me.

"Yup," I said. "I love doing it."

"I've never met anyone who's actually done it," Alexander said.

I suddenly realized what a big mistake I'd made. People weren't supposed to have weapons at all in Panem, unless they were in the Games...

"It's cool," Alexander said, smiling. "I've always wanted to learn how to fight with a sword."

"Really?" I said.

"Yeah," Alexander said. "Just seems like an interesting thing to do."

And so he got a sword tattoo, going from his shoulder down to his elbow... just like my arrow.

"So, where to next?" I asked Alexander as we walked out of the tattoo shop.

"I wanted to show you this really cool place," Alexander said. "Not many people know that it's there, but it's really cool."

"Okay," I said, taking his hand as he led me down the street. We took multiple twists and turns, and after about fifteen minutes of walking we reached it. There were flowers everywhere, and surrounding the flowers was a small river of water that went around in a circle. The flowers bloomed everywhere, colors bursting.

"Wow," I breathed, taking in the sight.

"Amazing, isn't it?" Alexander said, smiling down at me. Although he looked to be about the same age as me, he was taller.

"Absolutely amazing," I said.

Alexander led me over to a bench and sat me down. I breathed in the nice smell of the flowers which blocked out the strange smell of the Capitol.

"Lavinia," Alexander said slowly.

"Yes?" I replied, turning around and looking him in the eye.

"I..." Alexander started to say, swallowing weirdly. "I have to tell you something."

"Go ahead," I said.

"Ever... ever since I laid eyes on you, I thought you were beautiful," Alexander said, breathing heavily. My heart beat quickly, though I didn't know why. "No, I thought you were gorgeous. I thought you were the most gorgeous girl I've ever met. You're not like the other Capitol people; you're normal. And that's what I love about you."

I gulped when I comprehended that he said the words "I", "Love," and "You" in the same sentence.

"Lavinia, I know I just met you, but I fear that if I don't tell you this now I never will," Alexander said. "I love you."

My hear seemed to explode as soon as he finished his sentence.

"I love you too," I said, smiling a genuine smile. The first big smile I'd ever done in my whole life. "I love you so much."

And then he did something I'd never forget; he kissed me. I'd never been kissed before in my life, but it felt wonderful. We sat there for a few minutes, kissing and hugging and smiling like fools at each other. My heart beat faster and faster each time I looked at him. And I finally realized why my heart beat fast; I was in love.

I finally had to pull away from him so I could catch my breath, but it pained me to do so. We smiled broadly at each other and I leaned back on the bench and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Lavinia," Alexander said slowly. "There's something else I have to tell you."

"What is it?" I asked, still grinning.

"I love you," he said. "I love you so much. And that's why I have to tell you this. Yesterday, after you headed back to the Hotel, I started to walk back home and saw President Snow talking to someone. I overheard their conversation and... he said something about a girl from District 12. Somebody named Melany. Does that name sound familiar?"

My heart stopped beating for a moment. Melany.

"Yeah," I said.

"President Snow was talking about killing her," Alexander whispered.

"When?" I asked, my throat tightening.

"He didn't say," Alexander said. "He just said something about her being a problem and that he didn't think the plan would work. I don't know what 'the plan' is, but I have a feeling it's not good."

I sat in silence, not knowing what to say.

"I'm sorry," Alexander said. "I shouldn't have told you."

"No, no," I said, looking up at him. "I'm glad you did. But there's... there's something I have to tell you, now."

"What is it?" Alexander asked, taking my hand. Warmth washed over me as soon as he touched it and I couldn't help but smile, but it quickly vanished as I realized that what I was going to tell him wouldn't make him happy.

"My name isn't... Lavinia," I said. "It's Melany. You see, President Snow he... killed my family because I wasn't staying out of trouble. He said I caused too much... hope. So he killed my family and then sent me to the Capitol so I wouldn't be able to cause any more trouble. And now you said that he's talking about killing me..."

"You're... Melany?" Alexander whispered, letting go of my hand. Coldness washed over me as soon as he let go and I felt tears welling up. He wasn't going to love me anymore. I'd lied to him.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I thought that if I forgot who I was then I could forget my family. It didn't work, though. I still see my family in people from the Capitol. That's why I ran into you the day we met; I saw a little girl who looked like my sister and wasn't paying attention to where I was going."

Alexander was silent. I was silent.

"You can't stay here," he finally said. "It's too dangerous."

"I can't leave you," I whispered.

"Then... then we'll go together," Alexander said, taking my hand again. Relief washed over me; he still loved me.

"Go where?" I asked.

"Anywhere," Alexander said, smiling slightly. "Anywhere away from here."


	19. Chapter XIX

We left that night. We figured, the sooner the better. Alexander told his parents he was going to be gone for a few days and they didn't question him any further. Apparently they wanted some time alone for themselves. As Alexander and I crossed the train tracks quietly and onto the other side, we held hands. We never let the other one go. We snuck past the few peacekeepers that there were and through the city until we finally reached the forest.

"Where exactly are we going?" I whispered to Alexander.

"Where would you like to go?" he whispered back.

"... I guess I'd like to see my friend Katniss back in 12," I said.

"Alright; then we'll go there," Alexander said, smiling as we entered the forest.

We walked through the forest for days, and soon it became weeks. We really didn't even know which direction District 12 was, we just kept on walking further and further away from the Capitol. Alexander had packed a lot of food when we'd left and had packed water as well. But after two weeks, our supplies began to run out.

"Here," Alexander said one night, handing me his piece of chicken. Usually chicken wasn't good to eat cold, but at the Capitol it stayed warm for a long time.

"No," I said, not taking it. "You need to eat, too."

"Food is running out, Mel," Alexander said. He'd started calling me by my real name ever since I'd told him what it was.

"You need to eat, too," I repeated.

Alexander sighed and took a bite of the chicken, knowing that I wouldn't take it.

"Where do you think we are?" I asked him.

"I'm not sure," he said. "I'm hoping close to District 12."

"There's not a lot of food there," I said.

"I know," he said. "But it's better than no food at all."

It was getting dark out, and Alexander soon put out the fire. Alexander handed me his bag that he kept the food in and I laid my head down on it, using it as a pillow. I sighed and looked up through the trees at the night sky.

"Alexander?" I asked. "What if we don't make it?"

"We will," Alexander said. "We will."

I inched closer to Alexander and he pulled me into his arms. We sat there all night in each other's arms, never once letting go.

My eyes opened slowly. There was a strange whirring noise. I looked up and saw something large and silver move through the sky. I immediately grew worried.

"Alexander?" I whispered, shaking him awake. "What's that?"

He moaned and looked up, and as soon as his eyes locked on it he shot up and grabbed my arm. We started running.

"What is it?" I asked him.

"It's a hovercraft," Alexander explained, pulling me behind him. "The Capitol uses them sometimes, and I doubt right now they're doing a friendly patrol through the forest. They know we're missing."

We dashed through the forest, clothes ripped from getting caught on loose branches, trying to outrun the hovercraft. And then I saw something in the distance; a girl and a boy. I recognized them immediately; Katniss and Gale. My eyes locked with her's and I started to run faster toward her.

"Help!" I called, but I could tell by her face that she didn't recognize me. I heard a whooshing noise and I was suddenly tangled in a net. The net started lifting me quickly up off the ground, but not before I saw a spear shoot down from the hovercraft and go through Alexander's throat.

"Alexander!" I screamed as he started to fall to the ground. The rope that was attached to the spear started to pull him up into the hovercraft. Tears ran down my cheeks. I looked back down at Katniss and Gale, who only stared at us in horror. I reached my hand through the net and toward Katniss as if some last attempt of trying to get her to help me, though I knew she couldn't. I looked over at Alexander, with the spear through his throat, and more tears fell.

"Alexander," I whispered right before I was pulled into the hovercraft and everything went black.


	20. Chapter XX

Peacekeepers dragged me into a room and I smelled the all too familiar blood.

"Ah, Lavinia," Snow said. "Or should I say Melany?"

"It's Lavinia," I said, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. Only Alexander was able to call me Melany; nobody else.

"Alright, Lavinia," Snow said. "Apparently the Capitol couldn't shut you up."

Snow tilted his head slightly upward and the peacekeepers that were holding me shoved me to my knees.

"So, maybe this will," Snow said.

A peacekeeper walked over to me and forced open my mouth. Another peacekeeper took out a knife and started to come toward me with it. I remembered seeing the Avox girl and remembered Alexander's dad saying "well, they are traitors". I had run away from the Capitol; I was a traitor.

I struggled against the peacekeepers, but it was no use. The peacekeeper came at me with the knife and began the bloody process.

It hurt worse than anything I'd ever felt before. I remember screaming a lot, and soon I'd screamed so much that I couldn't do it anymore; all that came out was a hoarse moan.

I finally felt the pain ease up as the peacekeeper took his knife out of my mouth with something in his hand. I looked at it and I felt like throwing up; it was my tongue. Blood was everywhere in my mouth.

"That wasn't so hard, was it?" Snow said, laughing.

Anger boiled inside me and I twisted myself out of the peacekeeper's grip and charged at Snow. I tackled him to the ground and started punching the living daylights out of him. I spit the blood out of my mouth and onto his face, adding to his horrible smell. Peacekeepers rushed over to me and hoisted me off of him. Snow looked bewildered and furious, but I didn't care. He had killed my family, he had killed my first and only true love. He had taken everything away from me.

"Take her away," Snow said angrily, then, as the peacekeepers dragged me out of the room and away from Snow, I heard him shout something after me. "Enjoy being an Avox!"


	21. Chapter XXI

I had little training on what to do, but I knew that if I didn't do what I was supposed to than I would be punished further. So I did what I was told; I didn't do any communication of any kind toward anybody. I didn't do anything unless it was an order. The 73rd Hunger Games happened, and, like usual, the District 12 tributes died.

But then came the 74th.

I walked into the dining room, as usual, to serve the food, when my eyes locked on a familiar face. Katniss Everdeen. I laied down a blazing cake in front of her. She looked at it and I could tell she was already part drunk.

"What makes it burn? Is it alcohol?" she asked, then looked up at me. "That's the last thing I wa- oh! I know you!"

Horror filled me and I immediately shook my head and started to walk away. As much as I wanted Katniss to remember me, I knew she'd only be in more trouble. Anybody who knew an Avox knew a traitor, and they would automatically be branded a traitor too.

I hurried away from the table, though I could hear some sort of conversation behind me.

"Delly Cartwright!" I heard a familiar voice say. "That's who it is." I slightly turned by head and smiled. Peeta. He could always save the day with his words. I turned around and headed out of the room, but than horror filled me. Katniss and Peeta. I knew them both. They were both tributes going to the games... and every year the tributes from District 12 always died. I prayed that this year would be different.

I heard a crashing noise just as I walked by Katniss's room, and I slowly opened the door. My eyes widened as I stared down at broken dishes everywhere.

"Just leave it!" Katniss screamed at me. "Just leave it alone!"

I slowly closed the door behind me and headed toward the bathroom. I grabbed a cloth and got it wet then headed out to where Katniss was. I started to gently wipe her face with the wet cloth and then rubbed it on her hands, which were bleeding from the broken plates.

"I should have tried to save you," she whispered.

That's when I knew she didn't remember me. The real me, anyway; Melany. She only remembered me from the woods that day. The day that Alexander had died. But I didn't blame her; she couldn't have helped me anyway. I shook my head no.

"No, it was wrong," Katniss said.

I tapped my lips with my finger and pointed at her, trying to say that she would have become an Avox, too.

Katniss helped me clean up the rest of the garbage and broken plates. I shouldn't have let her; it was my job, not her's. But the help had been nice.

After the mess was in the garbage, I pulled down her bed sheets and she crawled in. I pulled the blanket over her and tucked her in. She reminded me of Elissa in some ways. Although Elissa was older than Katniss and I, she had to go to the games just like Katniss was. I only wished I'd been there to tuck Elissa in at night before she went to the games.


	22. Chapter XXII

I dropped the dish I was carrying and it shattered on the ground. Screams sounded from everywhere but I barely heard them.

I stared at the TV screen in absolute horror. The District 2 girl, Clove I think was her name, had pinned Katniss to the ground and had taken out a knife. Images of Elissa bloodied and broken popped into my head and I shoved them away immediately. I couldn't tear my eyes away from the screen, just like when Elissa had been tortured to death.

There had been a rule change; two tributes from the same District could win. Katniss had gone to the feast to get medicine for Peeta, but now her plan had backfired.

I heard voices around me but didn't pay any attention to what they were saying. I watched in horror as Clove lowered the knife down and started to cut Katniss's lips. That's where the District 2 girl had begun with Elissa, too. The lips. Just as I was sure that Katniss was done for, the boy from 11, Thresh, scooped up Clove. She started screaming for Cato, but Thresh threw her to the ground, picked up a rock, and threw it at her head. A large dent immediately appeared on her head where the rock had hit it, and I knew she was done for.

"You better run now, Fire Girl," Thresh said to Katniss, who was still staring at Clove in awe.

Katniss quickly got up, grabbed her bow, and ran away. I breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe if she and Peeta were the last ones, maybe then Cato wouldn't torture her to death like Elissa had been. Maybe Katniss would die a peaceful death. And maybe, just maybe, she could actually win.

Katniss and Peeta and Cato. Who would have thought that the two tributes from District 12 would be alive in the final battle?

Mutts had chased them up a cornucopia. The mutts snarled and tried to jump onto the cornucopia, but couldn't.

Cato had Peeta in a headlock and Katniss had an arrow loaded, pointed at them.

"Go ahead," Cato said, smiling insanely. "Shoot me and he goes down with me."

I saw Peeta slightly pointing to Cato's hand, and I prayed that Katniss saw what he's trying to say. She could shoot Cato's hand and maybe Peeta could escape the headlock he was in. And Katniss did see it. She let go of the bowstring and the arrow pierced Cato's hand. He shouted and Cato kicked him backward. Cato fell to the mutts, who snarled and bit into him. His screams were agonizing. Even though he was from the same District as the girl who'd tortured my sister to death, I felt bad for him. But a smile slowly spread across my face, none the less. They'd done it. They'd won. I stared up at the TV screen. I quickly had to look away, though, because I had to do my work. My job as an Avox was the serve; not to watch.

I picked up dirty dishes, but kept my eyes fixed on the screen as often as I could. A voice rang out, suddenly, saying that there could only be one victor. That would mean that one of them would have to die...

Peeta insisted that Katniss kill him, but Katniss wouldn't. A tragic end for the lovers of District 12. Though I didn't quite believe that they were in love, I knew that Katniss wouldn't kill him. I saw her suddenly pull out berries and put some in Peeta's hand. I knew those berries; nightlock. The girl from 5 had eaten them and died, and Peeta had almost eaten them.

Just as the berries touched their lips, a voice rang out in and said to stop. Then the voice dubbed them the victors of the 74th Hunger Games. Katniss and Peeta threw the berries to the ground. I saw a hovercraft come down and carry Katniss and Peeta up, and I smiled a large smile. They'd done it. Both of them. They'd won the games.

I slowly opened the door to the room Katniss was in and carried in a tray of food. I knew she would be starving and wish I could have given her more food. I laid the tray on her legs and grabbed a remote and pressed the up button on it. Her bed slowly raised and she stared at me. I fluffed her pillows and started to leave. I wanted to tell her congratulations. No, more than that; I wanted to tell her that she was a great friend. I wanted to tell her that I was Melany, the girl she had saved countless times. I wanted to tell her everything that Snow had done. I wanted to tell her that I was more than just a redheaded Avox girl that had been taken by the Capitol.

"Did Peeta make it?" Katniss said, her voice scratchy. I slowly walked back over to her bed and nodded my head. I took a spoon from the tray and fed her some of the applesauce. Then I left her to her food and leave the room, the door closing loudly behind me. She would be alright. She and Peeta were alive, and would stay alive.

It had been a year since Katniss and Peeta had won the games. I could tell from overhearing conversations that Snow wasn't happy about the trick they'd pulled off in the arena. And now he'd decreed that for the 75th Hunger Games, the third Quarter Quell, the victors would have to compete. Katniss and Haymitch had been reaped, but Peeta had volunteered. It was sweet of him to do so. I believed that he truly did love Katniss, but I wasn't quite sure about Katniss loving him yet.

I turned around, laundry in my hands, and ran straight into a man. My laundry flew everywhere, and I quickly knelt down and picked it up. I saw a hand reach down and quickly looked up, wondering who on earth would help an Avox. And then I see the way that he swallows and know immediately; he's an Avox like me. I stare at him for a while. I never remembered seeing him before, and yet there he was. He helped me up and laid the laundry in my hands. I took out a pad of paper that I carried with me now at all times. Nobody knew I had it; technically I wasn't even supposed to have it. But if I couldn't speak through my mouth, then I would speak through writing. I slowly wrote down a sentence and handed it to him.

"My name is Lavinia," it said. He scribbled something down and handed it back to me.

"I'm Darius," it read.

"I think I remember you," I wrote. "From District 12?"

"Yeah," Darius wrote back. "Though I don't remember you."

"I changed my hair," I wrote. "It used to be brown. I changed my name too. My actual name is actually Melany."

Though I never wanted to tell anybody my real name, I figured I could trust Darius. After all, he was in the same situation as me, practically. Why shouldn't we be friends?

"Ah, Melany," he wrote. "I remember you now. You sold quite a few squirrels, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I wrote back. I wondered how he'd gotten here; after all, he wasn't really known for doing anything wrong.

"I know you're wondering how I got here," Darius wrote. "Snow found out that I'd known about people hunting outside of the District, and he got pretty mad that I didn't do anything about it. So, here I am now."

He'd written "other people hunting outside the District", but I knew he meant me.

"I'm sorry," I wrote.

"It's not your fault," Darius wrote.

"Yes it is," I wrote back. Then, not wanting to talk about it anymore, I started to write my story. I wrote about how I'd caused too much hope and how I'd been running away with the boy from the Capitol and how he'd been killed and how I'd ended up here.

"Wow," Darius wrote. "I'm sorry."

"There's nothing else to really say, is there?" I wrote back. "We're sorry for each other, right? How about we just call each other friends and leave it at that?"

"Sure," Darius wrote back, smiling slightly. "It'll be good to have somebody to write to around here."

I smiled and took the pad of paper and pen from him. I stuck them in my pocket and put out my hand. He put out his and we shook. It would be good to have a friend. Maybe I wouldn't feel so alone and so useless.


	23. Chapter XXIII

Darius and I headed out to welcome the tributes from District 12. I saw Katniss and Peeta first, and then saw Haymitch, who was sort of glaring at us. I turned my head slightly, wondering what he was glaring at, and then heard Effie speak.

"Looks like they got a pair this year," she said, then smiled as if nothing was wrong. I looked at Darius and for once realized that we looked like twins. We each had red hair, our faces looked nearly identical, and it was sort of freaky. Katniss stared at us and her eyes filled with horror. Haymitch grabbed her arm and she suddenly turned around and ran away. I looked at Darius and he shrugged, and we headed back to start picking up dishes.

It was a water arena. I knew that nearly nobody knew how to swim in District 12. I didn't even know how to. But when the countdown reached zero, Katniss jumped off the pedestal and started swimming. Peeta stayed where he was, obviously unable to swim. I gritted my teeth and continued working, but looked up at the TV screen whenever I could. Katniss survived the games once, I thought to myself. She can do it again.

I stared in horror as blood poured out of Katniss's arm. Johanna quickly jumped off of Katniss and dashed away. Brutus and Enobaria came out of nowhere and looked down at Katniss.

"She's good as dead," Brutus said. "Come on, Enobaria!"

After a few minutes she stood up and started racing toward the tree where she'd put the wire on. Their whole plan had been confusing to me because I'd only caught bits and parts of it on the televisions.

"Katniss!" Peeta howled in the distance.

"Peeta! I'm here! Peeta!" Katniss shouted back, hiding in a tree. What's she doing? I thought. Getting herself killed? And then I understood. She wanted to get herself killed so that Peeta could survive. Maybe she really did love him...

Finnick and Enobaria appeared out of nowhere, right in front of the tree Katniss was in. A cannon sounded.

"Katniss!" Peeta shouted in the distance. Katniss didn't reply. She knocked an arrow on her bow and pulled the bowstring back. She aimed at Enobaria and looked like she was going to shoot when she suddenly dropped the bow. She shakily grabbed the wire and winded it around one of her arrows. She stood up, revealing herself, and knocked the arrow. She pulled back on the bowstring and aimed upward. What is she aiming at? I thought. The sky?

I saw Finnick and Enobaria stare at Katniss, but she didn't even care about them. She let go of the bowstring and the arrow soared through the air and hit something in the sky. Lightning struck the wire that was attached to the arrow and electricity raced upward and there was a blinding blue light. Katniss was thrown off the ground and explosions were everywhere. A hovercraft appeared in the arena, and just as it did the screens went black, making whatever happened next a mystery to all who were watching. Including me.


	24. Chapter XXIV

The doors burst open and I immediately sat up. Peacekeepers trudged into the room and grabbed my arms. I tried to ask what was going on, but couldn't since I was an Avox. They dragged me out of my bedroom and one of the peacekeepers threw a club at my head, knocking me out.

My eyes opened slowly and I immediately knew something was wrong. My eyesight was blurry, my head throbbed, and I was in some sort of cage. I shook my head to clear my vision and looked around, and sure enough; I was in a cage. I looked to the right and saw an all too familiar face; Peeta. I tried to say his name, but all that came out was a weird moan. Peeta heard it, however, and turned to look at me. He immediately sat up and stared at me.

"Why are you here?" he asked. I shrugged; I had no idea. "I didn't hear them bring you in. Do you know how long you've been here?"

I shook my head. He looked at me with pain in his eyes. I saw blood run down his arms and wondered what on earth they'd done to him. I turned my head and saw Darius, who was still knocked out.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as I turned back to face him. "It's probably my fault you're here."

I reached into my pocket for my note pad, but found that it was gone. I stuck my hand in further and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper. I pulled out my pen that had been in my other pocket. Obviously, whoever had searched me before I'd been taken here hadn't searched enough. Then again, I was an Avox; I shouldn't have had anything to hide. But I did.

I unfolded the piece of paper and read what had been last written on it. "It'll be good to have somebody to write to around here." Darius's words. I'd remembered the first time I'd seen him, with his red hair and smile despite all he'd been through. I turned the piece of paper over and started to write very small. I handed the piece of paper through the bars of the cage and to Peeta.

"It's okay," it read. "You really do love Katniss, don't you?"

He smiled and nodded, then passed the piece of paper back to me. I began writing small again, then handed the piece back to Peeta. I'd used almost the whole page up already.

"It's sweet," I wrote. "Peeta? I've got to tell you something. I'm not who you think I am. My name is Lavinia, but you also know me from District 12. My name is Melany."

Peeta stared down at the piece of paper and then looked back up at me.

"Melany," he repeated. "That sounds familiar."

I reached through the bars and he passed the piece of paper to me. I started to write down my next sentence. I only had room for a few more replies...

"You saved me," I wrote. "A peacekeeper almost shot me. My family worked at a bakery just like you."

Peeta stared down at the piece of paper and looked back up at me, realization in his eyes.

"Melany?" he breathed. "That's you?"

I nodded and smiled slightly. I knew I probably looked completely different with my red hair and tattoos, but there had to be at least a little bit of me still left.

"Wait," Peeta said, studying my face. "Oh my gosh. It is you. How'd you get here? Katniss told me about the time in the woods. She didn't know it was you, did you?"

I shook my head. Peeta handed me back my piece of paper. I could only write a few more sentences. I really didn't want to tell him; and I didn't think I had enough room on the paper to, anyway.

"You know what?" Peeta said, just as I was about to begin writing. "Don't tell me how it happened. You don't have to. I know it must be hard to talk about it..."

I smiled and nodded my head in thanks. I scribbled something down and handed the piece of paper to him.

"If you get out of here," I wrote. "Don't tell anybody my real name. Don't mention my real name at all. President Snow hates me, and if he finds out anybody talked with me then he'll surely punish you."

Peeta stared at me for a while but slowly nodded in agreement to never tell anybody my name.

I heard a door open and whipped my head around to stare into the eyes of multiple peacekeepers. They started to come toward my cage, and I quickly scribbled down three words just as they opened the door to my cage. I threw the piece of paper through the bars of the cage and at Peeta just as they grabbed me. I saw Peeta read the piece of paper and look up at me. I'd written the only comforting words I'd known: "It'll be okay."

The peacekeepers dragged me over to a strange machine and strapped me to it. I looked over at Darius and Peeta. Darius was just waking up, and Peeta was staring at me in horror. I was suddenly dowsed in water from head to toe. Both Darius and Peeta were staring at me in horror now. I smiled slightly at them just as the peacekeeper pulled the lever.

I felt something surge through my body and my eyes grew large. I saw my dad chasing Lance and Becky around the house. Elissa, Manda, and my mom laughed as he did so. That was my favorite memory. Everyone was happy and everybody was there.

Just as everything was fading to black, I did something I thought I'd never do; I laughed.


	25. Epilogue

It's amazing how time can go so slow and so fast. When Elissa died, it had been slow. When Manda, Lance, and Becky had died, it had been fast. When I had died, it had gone fast but it felt slow.

I remember waking up in the brightness. I remember walking toward the double doors that led to my future. I remember walking through those doors and smelling the glorious smell that I couldn't quite place. I remember seeing my dad, smiling and waving at me. I remember running to him and pulling him into a hug, tears of happiness running down my cheeks. I remember seeing Becky, Lance, and Mada, all charging toward me and hugging me all at once. I remember Elissa running over and picking me up in a large hug. I remember my mom smiling at me and hugging me tight. I remember Alexander clearing his throat and me turning around and facing him. I remember running to him and kissing him over and over, then just hanging on to him for a long time.

Memories are what keep us going. Without memories, we'd all be dead. Without memories, we'd all be empty.

Darius arrived later, and he looked genuinely happy to be here. Now I sit here in the clouds, writing my story to you, and smile as my family runs past, giggling and laughing. The world I had been to before I came here was a world of nothing but horrible games and blood-smelling men. I'm glad I left that world.

Elissa doesn't have a torn up body; it looks completely new without a blemish in sight. Manda doesn't have any bruises, Lance doesn't have a scar where the sword had pierced him, and Becky doesn't have a hole in her head. Alexander doesn't have a scar on his neck from where the spear had gone, and Darius has his tongue back... as do I.

You'd think that the place where the dead go would be black and dreary, but this place is the complete opposite of that. It is bright and full of laughter and hope.

Now I remember the word hope. How it got me in trouble in the world before and how up here it was used frequently.

My story doesn't end here in Paradise. It will never end, for where I am now has no end. I will live in this beautiful, happy place forever. I smile as I watch my family laughing together. Now I write my last words to you. In a few minutes I will go to be with my family and laugh with them and tell them I love them.

"Hey, Melany," Elissa says, running over to me and taking my hand. "What's that?"

"My story," I say, smiling as I scribble down everything that she is saying and I am saying.

"You mean, like your life story?" she asks me.

"Yeah," I say, smiling. "You want to read it?"

"Sure," Elissa says, grinning. "Is the ending happy?"

"Very," I say.

So now I write my last words that you will read from me. Though my life is not yet over, I have to end this book at some point. So I will end it now (besides, Elissa wants to read it). I only have one thing to tell you. You may choose to accept what I say or decline it, but that is your decision. What I have to say to you is this: No matter what situation you are in, no matter what you are going through, always remind yourself that everything will be okay.


End file.
